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Finally done with restraining order hearing

Jcksjj's picture

Submitted by Jcksjj on Fri, 01/06/2023 - 12:14pm

DH finally had his restraining order hearing, which he won. FIL showed up with his arm in a sling and his dentures taken out for effect. FILs attorney did a lot of lying and attempting to get DH to misspeak so he could call him a liar. FIL said almost nothing except that DH punched him and claimed he had a massive amount of injuries. Didn't even tell his version of the story. 

The judge told FIL that there was enough evidence to show harassment because there was an act of violence, and the events leading up to it (showing up unexpectedly at our house and DHs work etc) also did. She also said that she could probably find DH guilty of harassment also but they don't do both ways at that type of hearing. It annoyed me that she said that, I'm assuming it was because DH swung back at him, so that is technically an act of violence. But still, DH ignored them for years, and they aggressively pursued a fight for years so it was irritating that she threw that in. But whatever, hopefully now it's over. MIL and FIL both looked old and tired, and MIL looked a bit ashamed when she saw me walk in to the courtroom. As she should.

Comments

Aniki-Moderator's picture

Submitted by Aniki-Moderator on Fri, 01/06/2023 - 12:16pm

Yahoo

Ispofacto's picture

Submitted by Ispofacto on Fri, 01/06/2023 - 1:23pm

Some judges are old fashioned and still subscribe to the tradition of children being unconditionally deferential to their elders, however psycho they may be.

You'd think with all the dysfunction they see everyday, they'd wholeheartedly embrace the concept of disengaging, but some judges are not very bright.

She fed FIL's victim psychosis somewhat, and that is unfortunate. Hopefully he still understands to leave ya'll alone now.

 

Jcksjj's picture

Submitted by Jcksjj on Fri, 01/06/2023 - 1:26pm

It felt to me like a judge that didn't understand DV dynamics and thinks there's always 2 sides to everything. Or maybe thinks a son and dad can't have that dynamic. 

AgedOut's picture

Submitted by AgedOut on Fri, 01/06/2023 - 1:40pm

I think it was more of a warning. That if your husbands family resurfaces and attacks him, call 911, do what you have to to protect yourself abut don't pummel the crap out of them (even though they deserve it)

Jcksjj's picture

Submitted by Jcksjj on Fri, 01/06/2023 - 2:19pm

Maybe? He didn't actually hurt FIL at all even though he did swing back at him, but they did try to make it sound way worse and really tried to play up FIL as a weak old man. 

I will also say DH did come across as the angrier party (which he should be, but still) and did get in a couple snarky remarks towards his parents about their behavior that I think he wanted to get out in a safe place. Not great for court, but I think it made him feel better for him to be able to tell them he knew what they were doing. 

StepUltimate's picture

Submitted by StepUltimate on Fri, 01/06/2023 - 3:06pm

So happy to read this update!!

Biggrin