SS Not Brushing Teeth..
Hello!
Just needing to vent... last night I was brushing toddler's teeth and ran out of her toothpaste so I thought I'd borrow some from SS toothpaste from his bathroom... only to find no toothpaste or toothbrush in sight. I asked him where his toothpaste was and he replied that he has not had any. I asked what he has been brushing his teeth with and he said he hasnt been. I asked for how long and he didn't know. I asked when the last time he remembered brushing and he said it was at his grandparents house (weeks ago) so I asked when was the last time he had a toothbrush or brushed at home and he said since we moved in at the BEGINNING OF MAY!!! *bad*
I told him to tell his father since I pretty much don't get involved much after that so when he told him he hasn't brushed because he didn't have a toothbrush since May, DH just said "You haven't had one? Okay I'll get you a toothbrush..." that was it.
I often remind the kids several times a week to brush teeth, hair, etc. Normally before we leave places and not ONCE has he mentioned he didn't have a toothbrush...
I am not surprised since SS is messy, doesn't shower often and doesnt mind stench but wow... I was shocked to learn it has been 4 months since he last brushed his teeth...
Just needed to vent!
Edit***
I used to make sure skids
I used to make sure skids always had toothbrushes and toothpaste at our house. I don't think either one has ever brushed his teeth at our house. Then one of them tried to claim that they didn't brush because they didn't have toothbrushes at our house. Um, I have put a toothbrush in their stockings every year, always color coded, green for one SS, blue for the other. There are at least two for each kid in the kid bathroom and several more unopened, so it's not on me. There is also always toothpaste in that bathroom.
Yeah, we usually have extras
Yeah, we usually have extras too and they get toothbrushes at every dentist visit! No idea what he did with it... due for another dentist visit here soon so we will see how that goes.
Total Bull Sh**
SS just making excuses...He doesn't want to do it....And now it's your fault.... Not that he has a mouth and could of said. I need toothpaste please.. It's your fault for not setting everything up. Because once again SM is always wrong.
Yep!
Yep pretty much! Nothing is EVER his fault. It's always someone else's fault, or I am expecting too much, or DH just takes blame for not reminding him. I pretty much stopped trying since he isn't held accountable ever.
No more reminders or
No more reminders or suggestions.
The SDs did not brush their teeth when I met them. Not even at BMs! 7 and 9! There were a ton of hygiene issues. But I got them started brushing teeth with toddler toothpaste, once in the morning and once at night. YSD17 liked the routine and kept it up until the last year. Not sure she's brushed her teeth at our place for a long time now.
OSD started fighting hard around the time she pushed back on everything I was trying around age 10. What stopped me cold turkey from toon brushing help was one morning OSD was having a stupid breakdown about having to brush before they left for school. And DH backed her up, saying toothbrushibg wasn't that big of a deal. I said ok then, all dental costs are on you and BM and any issues you deal with 100% on your own.
And then didn't do a damn thing.
OSD never brushed her teeth, or just brushed with water sometimes. She wouldn't tolerate any toothpaste foam or strong flavor (related to her sensitivity disorder), but firm insistence from the PARENTS would have helped correct it or found options. All bridges were burned with me and by age 13 her teeth were yellow and coated with plaque, vile vile breath. DH tried getting her to brush at that point but it was too late and he gave up anyway.
There's nothing you can do if the parents don't care.
Wow
Oh boy! Yep I've pretty much come to that conclusion to from bathing to deodorant and cleaning his room and bathroom. I gave up trying.. it's DH problem. I take all 3 kids to dentist next month for cleanings so DH can pay for any additional dental care that occurs.
I hope you are taking them
I hope you are taking them for a good reason. If the dentist has concerns your DH should be the one to hear it. If there's a good reason he cannot and the dentist wants to talk about problems you RECORD every word and make your DH listen to it.
When OSD got really stinky I stopped letting her in my car or doing things with her unless she bathed. I refused to sit next to her. So you have more challenges coming.
Smh.
This kid will likely be a toothless moron as an adult who whines that he does not have dental insurance.
He may learn a lesson if he ends up with a mouth full of painfully rotten teeth.
Yep!
Yep most likely. I've had to learn to stop caring... since no one else does!
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Show the gross little SS this
Show the gross little SS this picture https://www.yorksmilecare.com/assets/images/case1-b.jpg
Maybe print it out and post it around the house: Future SS
Ask him if he ever hopes someone will want to kiss him in the future and warn him that nasty breath, nasty body odor and rotten teeth will scare away most reasonably attractive partners.
I can assure you that one of
I can assure you that one of the first things a person looks at when they see another person is either their eyes or their smile.
If someone has jacked up teeth, I would NEVER consider making contact with them on a dating site or in person. I also look for impeccable hygiene and reasonably good grammar, spelling and vocab.
I was sent a video of a sonic
I was sent a video of a sonic cleaning and the built up tartar was so bad, it was bloody job. Very bloody. Freaked out my youngest and she brushes. LOL. You tube is full of these videos. Pull a few up and show DH.
Gross!
Seriously! We've had many conversations with the kids about proper hygiene and for now SS10 has 1 more year til Middle School so lack of hygiene will be noticed much more by peers. I am hoping if I show DH and SS that link maybe there could be hope!! Maybe..
here's a couple more links.
here's a couple more links.
https://youtu.be/8h8In9znQJs?si=-DDkvb3JHumq_lM6
https://youtube.com/shorts/sh9qx5rKxpc?si=Lap827eOT3W783s9
skids here don't brush their
skids here don't brush their teeth either. I've given up reminding them and said it's on them if they don't do it. I do however remind them about showers. I just woke up SD earlier from her slumber as she tried to get away with no shower and sleeping in her pjs after sleeping in them all night the night before, wore them to school all day (casual day theme was pjs!) and was going to sleep in them all night again with no shower. That just annoys me and I woke her up and said just change your pjs and she ended up having a shower lol. I just have no effs anymore when it comes to the skids laziness.
Yikes!
How frustrating! I always wonder how DH doesn't notice the smell. I know my SS10 has gone days without showering and i am positive he doesnt shower properly as his hair is sometimesnot washed and still smells. I do my best to remind the kids, bathe OD4 and find time for myself to shower.
Yeah the laziness is strong! So frustrating.
BO Stench and rancid breath.... impacts others in the home.
So, kids bathe and they perform dental hygiene. Parents verify it was done and done well. If the kid does not do it well, they do it under the hairy eyeball of a parent.
My SS bathed and cared for his teeth. Our related isse was when he was in his mid to late teens. He would shower and still emit an unpleasant odor. A sniff test showed it was his head. His hair was greasy and he smelled like a wet dog. He would get frustrated when we would comment that he stunk even after bathing. We had a number of conversations on it.
Finally, I had him put on a bathing suit and watched him shower. He started with his hair as we had trained him to do when he was learing to shower on his own. After hair, body. This cleans the head, then cleans the body eleminating any dirt, etc... that runs down the body from washing dirty hair.
He turned his shampoo bottle upside down above his head and squeezed. Then scrubbed with his hands and fingers. Then, he squeezed body wash onto the wash cloth and scrubbed is body with a nice lather. I sat laughing as I watched him. His shampoo bottle.... was empty. Since he was squeezing the bottle directly onto his head he did not realize it was empty. He would give his mom his list when he needed it. Toothpaste, body wash, etc.... No shampoo had been requested in who knows how long.
So, I had him wash his hair again, this time putting shampoo in his hand before lathering his hair....... The look on his face was hillarious when he realized he had not been washing his hair for who knows how long.
15-ish years later, SS-31 is hyper congnizant of his hygiene.
We still laugh about the upside down shampoo bottle phase of his teens.
As far as dental hygiene, order the chewable dye tabs and have the SKid chew one before brushing every evening. Then tell him to not stop until every bit of die is removed from his mouth.
Never forget, the smell test is the primary test to verify body and mouth hygiene on a kid. You can add tools to confirm tooth brushing effectiveness. It takes a ton of effort to get the dye off teeth.
Oh boy!
Yeah I have suggested to DH to aide him/watch him shower as I too have noticed the smell doesn't get better at times after showering. I do think getting those dye tabs could help thank you. My BD11 loves using those from the dentist so I'll have to pick them up. Unfortunately if I press to hard on DH to watch or monitor his hygiene then I am the a**hole and it always turns into "well your BD11 does a,b,c," which usually starts an argument...fun!! Yes, she is NOT perfect and has her own issues but I do my best to address them. Thanks for reminding me about the dyes!
When he gets stroppy, don't
When he gets stroppy, don't get drawn into an argument. Instead, ask him in a sad voice why he doesn't love his son enough to want to help him grow up into a decent human being and not one that everyone avoids due to his bad breath and body odour.