So I posted something similar to this late last night, but took it down when I went to work for fear that DH would see it. However he is now at work for the night so I thought I would try again.

What do you do when your DH tells you that he resents you but you know he really means he hates you and wants a divorce?

Let me elaborate. We got into a disagreement over something really stupid, scissors – I kid you not. What the issue is, for me anyways, is my DH’s lack of responsibility to or for anyone or anything. They were kitchen scissors, he had them on his workbench in the garage. I asked if he knew where scissors were he went straight to the garage, to his table and grabbed them. I said why are those out here (mind you they are quite pricy)? He said I donno I didn’t put them out here and I am not taking the blame for something I don’t know if I did. WTF? Are we five years old?

That obviously irritated me. I have respect for “oops, sorry it won’t happen again”, but I have no respect for “I didn’t do it”.

So as usual my DH escalates the whole thing into some serious soap opera. We end up fighting. We were in the total opposite side of the house from SS9 and SS11 (we are custodial they live here 90% of the time), and we live in a decent sized house 2500sf, so it wasn’t like they could hear anything. Our DD2 was in the very next room and could hear and see it all. Side note, I am also 7 months pregnant. I was keeping my voice and emotions to a minimum knowing she was in the next room. He was yelling, but insisting that I was causing a scene in front of HIS sons and told me straight to my face that he resents me for it because it always happens.

Then I was told I better “fix” it with the boys (pretty much take the blame and make DH look like a golden father in their eyes) or he would be divorcing me. I am so tired of having to apologize for things I shouldn’t and have unfair requests put on me. I am tired of always having to say I am the wrong one because he can’t man up that he isn’t perfect.

The worst part is that I had my afternoon with my DD interrupted (the only good part of my day) because BM left a voice mail and my DH refuses to learn how to check the thing so I had to stop what I was doing to check it and relay the message. That just ruined my mood so I came home and of course the fighting started again.

I don’t know what to do anymore. After many tears today on my part I finally told him we needed to go to counseling. He refused. I said well you asked me what I thought would help fix things and that is it because at this point we cannot do it on our own. He refused, slammed the door and went to work.