IDK what to think...prob blowing this out of proportion
So last night I met one of FDH's friends, not sure how good of friends they are. FDH has mentioned him in passing a couple of times, but not enough that I can even remember anything about him.
We were in a pretty loud environment so he was shouting in my ear. Introduced himself and said "Its good to finally meet you...its only been, what, 4 or 5 years?" with a chuckle. I said "No, we have only been together about a year and a half now." He goes on to say, "Well, anyways, he's been talking about you, even before the baby." I respond, "Well, thats interesting..."
I didn't correct him and tried to let it go. But I can't let it go. I'm pretty sure he thought he was meeting BM!!! They're kid is about to turn 6 so that makes more sense.
I'm upset that 1) FDH obviously nvr told his friend about me or his breakup with BM 2.5-3yrs ago, 2) this guy made it sound like FDH talks about BM all the time still, like they are still together.
I haven't said anything to FDH, but I feel like I have to. Maybe this is dumb, but it's eating me alive. I know he would be mad if he found out I was letting this fester, but I like to think I choose my battles. Is this friend just not that good of a friend he isn't current on the past 2.5-3 yrs of FDH life or does FDH rly still talk about BM all the time like nothing happened.
I'm starting to feel like a "in the mean time" girl. I'm starting to feel like he still loves BM and only left her b/c he felt like he had to after her cheating. I am also feeling like maybe this is just my paranoia and that I should just let it go.
I know I have to talk to FDH about this, but I don't want have some huge argument. I'm thinking of bringing it up like I found it funny or something and gauging a response. IDK
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Maybe this guys memory just
Maybe this guys memory just really sucks. DH has a friend that i have met like 6 or 7 times in the past 3 years and every time we see him he introduces himself. But if it really does bother you tell your husband it did, but dont blame him for his friends action.
You're totally right. I'm
You're totally right. I'm just worried I won't be able to bring it up w/o an attitude.
Maybe DH doesn't talk that
Maybe DH doesn't talk that much or the friend doesn't pay attention to details.
So ask DH, "Is your friend really smart? Because he confused me with BM. He said you are always talking about me even before the baby. So either you are pregnant and we need to alert the authorities or your friend has the retentions skills of a gnat."
I'm glad that you guys are
I'm glad that you guys are confirming that I'm more than likely being ridiculous. FDH does talk alot actually. One of his biggest complaints is that I don't talk enough.
We've been arguing and the little things are adding up. That's why I was considering the fact that I'm prob just being overly sensitive and silly. The best thing I think I can do, is to just bring it up and air it out.
My feeling is that just as
My feeling is that just as you knew very little about the friend and remembered even less, this guy probably can't remember the details of your guy's life either. In the moment he probably scratched his brain desperately trying to think of something relevant to say and that's the best he could come up with, trying to sound friendly and like he'd paid attention when his buddy talked about his love life.
It doesn't make sense that your fella actually is "obsessed" with his ex-wife. If he were truly always talking about her, he would be sure to say to his buddy "Hey, keep that stuff on the down low - remember it'll be Rose tonight, not ex-wife."
My DH calls me his ex-wife's name so often that his own brother made a joke about it in his toast at our wedding. We all just laugh about it. Believe me, there is not a single bit of nearly dead spark between DH and ex-wife. It's just habit and my DH is a bit absent minded. Sometimes he calls me his daughter's name, too.
My thought is if your guy was truly thinking about ex-wife all the time, he would be with her. Period.
Thanks everyone. Hearing
Thanks everyone. Hearing everyone's take on it, is rly making me feel better about it. I knew I was more than likely being silly about it, but it's nice to read others confirm that. I will bring it up with FDH tonight when I get home from work just to clear my head of it.
Guys really don't care much
Guys really don't care much about other guys relationships so it's easy to mix up the facts. Aside from being the hottest wife, when do you ever see a focus on athlete's wives? Guys just generally don't care who's dating who or who's married to who. mixing up facts on relationships is pretty normal for guys.
DH may not have wanted to mention the breakup so he kept referring his wife or girlfriend without explaining the transition. Most guys deal with break ups alone or with women in my experience. If they talk about it with a guy, it's likely only a very good friend.
What you learned from this conversation is that this guy is not a good friend of your DHs.