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Do you think it was to cause waves/argument? I haven't decided.

LaMareOssa's picture

Submitted by LaMareOssa on Wed, 10/15/2014 - 1:19pm

So a week or two ago, DH mentions to me that SD12 told him that "All the dads at the school were checking out LaMare. Maybe it's because she drives a truck, but the other moms drive big trucks too" :jawdrop:

I don't know why SD would say something like that to her father. DH wasn't upset or mad or anything, but I think it might have bothered him a tiny bit. DH is usually a very confidant man, but every once in a while I sense his insecurity. I don't know why, I've never done anything to make him question my loyalty. And I would NEVER ever do anything to hurt him. I would never cheat on him. I have ZERO desire to cheat on him, DH makes me VERY happy Wink lol
But I wonder if SD12 can sense that DH can be jealous. DH has never openly expressed his jealousy, but I know he can be.

So, when DH tells me this I was kind of shocked. Honestly, I'm not one to notice when men check me out, usually someone else points out when a guy is checking me out. I told DH that I've never noticed it. I blurted out "I don't know why they would be checking me out when there are moms at the school screaming for attention. The other moms wear makeup and do their hair before they pick up their kids from school and I rarely wear makeup."
DH said "Exactly. Thats why they were checking you out. You don't cake on makeup and wear a mask, you don't need it, you're beautiful without makeup on. You're not high maintenance and you're not screaming for attention. You're different and natural and men like that"

OMG! I blushed. I didn't know what to say so I squeaked out "thank you, Babe" lol

Anyway.. I don't think it was necessary for SD12 to tell her dad that men were checking me out. I didn't notice it so WTF? If I was flirting with the dads at the school, I could understand, but I wasn't and I don't get it. I thought maybe she told him in hopes of causing an argument between DH and I. I mentioned it to my mom and she said the same thing; SD12 was trying to cause waves.

Why?!?!?!?!

Comments

LaMareOssa's picture

Submitted by LaMareOssa on Wed, 10/15/2014 - 1:25pm

I think I agree. DH and I get along really and and we're happy. I don't put up with outsiders trying to cause waves in my marriage, but this person lives in our home 24/7. YAY :sick:

Glassslipper's picture

Submitted by Glassslipper on Wed, 10/15/2014 - 1:34pm

SD9 does it all the time in our house too...tells me her stories about mommy and daddy doing this and that behind my back, when DH is asked about her story in front of SD, she recants...
Growing up to stew drama...just like BM!

ChiefGrownup's picture

Submitted by ChiefGrownup on Wed, 10/15/2014 - 2:29pm

I notice my SD15 has hi def ordinance map of her dad's emotions, sometimes more than I do. It's because they've known each other 12 years longer and are blood. She mis-interprets many, many things because she's an immature kid without context or knowledge. But when it comes down to it, she can read her dad.

With that in mind, I'm guessing your SD can, too. If you have reason to believe she wasn't innocently conveying what she thought of as a compliment, then it's probably true she knew her dad would squirm and there might be a moment of discord. It's what my SD would do. Except she can bring herself to acknowledge my existence, let alone convey a positive remark toward me.

AllySkoo's picture

Submitted by AllySkoo on Wed, 10/15/2014 - 2:45pm

Preface: Don't take this the wrong way, I am NOT casting aspersions on your appearance! Lol

Maybe she genuinely can't figure it out. Here are these men, checking you out...WHY? What do you have that causes that? A big truck? No, that can't be it, other moms have big trucks. Hmmm.

Honestly, I don't think it was about YOU at all - not to compliment you OR cause issues for you. She's 12, she's a girl, she's going to want boys to check HER out and here you are getting noticed. So if she can figure out why, then maybe she can get noticed too. Your DH should tell her exactly what he told you - "[She's] not high maintenance and [she's] not screaming for attention. [She's] different and natural and men like that". A girl could do worse for something to shoot for. Smile

LaMareOssa's picture

Submitted by LaMareOssa on Wed, 10/15/2014 - 6:03pm

You make perfect sense. I am completely different from other moms at the school as well as her bm and aunt. They wear tons of makeup, are prissy, extremely high maintenance etc and i am not that way at all. I dont need a pound of makeup to feel or look pretty. I think sd12 is having trouble understanding how a man or boy could be interested in a women or girl who doesnt look like the rest of the women out there.

LaMareOssa's picture

Submitted by LaMareOssa on Wed, 10/15/2014 - 6:00pm

Her bm is completely out of the picture. But her bm is one of those women who wear a ton of makeup and scream for attention

IslandGal's picture

Submitted by IslandGal on Wed, 10/15/2014 - 8:36pm

I think she's causing waves. Reasons is because my niece does exactly this same thing to her dad (my cousin). She HATES his new wife with a passion and is very, very possessive of her Dad - she's type to sit on his lap, drapes herself all over him, kisses him all over his face, plays with his hair etc etc.. and she would dearly love to have him back to herself. But she can't as he has two kids with new wife, so my niece resorts to stupid games like this. she'll say things like "the landlord told step mom she looked hot today.. 'cos she was dressed in shorts".. and yep, my cousin would be pissed off and fight with his wife..just awful.

Back when SD was still visiting her Dad, she would make comments to both of us that her friends all think SO was hot, looked like the terminator, looked like the hulk..or my personal fave "where can I get a Dad like that?". SO would be embarrassed and I would get all dramatic, fling myself on him and say "yep - and he's MY terminator" .. that ended that nonesense real quick after that.