Would this drive you mad or is it me?
My ss is 16 and a passive agressive little shit..always in trouble with the cops and at school. He steals fights and takes drugs. Dh has every excuse in the book for his behaviour and pacifies him by buying him things or giving him money. He in return cannot even buy his father a birthday card.
I buy my OH things, namely an expensive pair of sneakers.ss comes into our bedroom and takes them to wear to phys ed. OH thinks this is fine it's only a pair of shoes , despite the fact the kid has many pairs of $200 sneakers in his room. I buy my OH cologne for christmas..we buy the ss the same, the ss uses his all up in about a week and is now using my OH,s is this me being really petty? It's driving me crazy.
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I know, I definitely will
I know, I definitely will stop but then i think why should my OH miss out..we do actually have a lock on the door but unfortunately the OH and the ss get in before me...thank you for your comments...glad it's not just me..
His acceptance of it does
His acceptance of it does upset me.. I would be horrified if it was my kid.. And I agree I need to stop buying things for the hubby..I'm getting better at it.. Thank you for your comments it really helps
Big hug and thank you..I will
Big hug and thank you..I will
Slowly losing respect...I can
Slowly losing respect...I can assure you
That is so maddening. My SO
That is so maddening. My SO does the same thing with my SS. He went on and on a couple of years ago about wanting an Ipod. I got him one. Now it's another video game for SS. This has happened with lots of things. I buy SO expensive trail mix just for him because he loves it. He gives it to SS.
I have stopped buying him anything that SS9 can use and he can buy his own special treats. I even told him I will never buy him another electronic device. He got pissed about that.
I know exactly what you mean,
I know exactly what you mean, I buy all the little treats for my SO and the ss just takes them...I'm going to stop putting my hand in my purse..I can tell you
Another absolute bomb has
Another absolute bomb has just been dropped...the DH has just called me up to say that from sept when the ss turns 17 he will be $600 per month worse off and he will have to 'find' the bm,s payments (maintenance) . He's just letting me know that we are ok till Sept...not sure how this effects me???
Could you explain your
Could you explain your situation a little more?
You are a stepfather who.lives in England but your husband's
payments to BM are in dollars? Why does he owe her
that money starting in September?
Kindly elaborate.
I'm a stepmother..don't know
I'm a stepmother..don't know why it says father.. I converted it to dollars so it's easier to get the picture the money is the maintenance payment that he's been paying all along but in sept he will get less money from the government cos the ss turns 17
Over here you get payments
Over here you get payments for each kid until they are 18..it amounts to $30 per week . If the child lives with you and it's not a normal situation..ie the child should be with it's mother..and lives with the father..like us..the government will help you care for the child a little..if you work under a certain amount of hours cos you have to care for the child..basically that money that the DH was getting was paying for the physcho ,s maintenance..so now the poor darling DH is going to be a little bit down on his money..if he thinks I'm helping to pay the bm"s money he is mad. The BM plays very little part in the ss"s life..she is a drug user..she sees her son once a week , I do everything the mother should do but have no authority
no it's not just you! yss11
no it's not just you!
yss11 does this (not drugs or anything!) anything that gets brought into this house, he needs to use it. he pisses on anything and everything to mark his territory, so to speak. he has this inner need to dominate everything. and GAWD it's annoying!
i'd tried to explain it to dh in the past "yss has his own shit, i bought such-and-such for YOU." one time even, with cologne, i told him it smells sexy and it's a turnon- how gross would it be if yss came in the room and i smelled it before i realized it was NOT my HUSBAND? i mean, seriously, EWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!! he still doesnt see it, so we agreed to disagree. so i simply dont buy shit like that anymore.
but yeah, not being able to have something that's not "marked" by a skid is totally maddening.
Ha ha me too.i honestly will
Ha ha me too.i honestly will go out of my way for anyone and I'm the most generous person you will ever meet...until you piss me off, I'd never thought of it like that but yes why would we want our skid smelling like the DH!!! I have 'let it go' did consider emptying the whole bottle out and replacing it with something disgusting but then I'd have to smell the DH too. No more expensive gifts I can tell you..