Ive totally disengaged from sd18 &sd21.
Tonight i have gone out with SO and his skids and totally ignored the eldest 2.
He has finally noticed how rude they both are towards me and we had a good heart to heart about the future and how the girls and him are the ones that will suffer. I told him out right that they wouldnt be welcome to set foot in our house if they cant learn basic manners. I asked him how he would feel if my daughter treated him the same way as his do to me. He agreed he wouldnt want her in the house! This is huge progress.
His eldest told him out right tonight that she wouldnt come into the house because i was there and he basically told her to grow up and get over herself. Yes i did lay it out to him when he was down but i think rhe point hit home.
His children disrespect him have no manners and that is a reflection on his poor parenting. I also ppibted out that other people in our community have noticed the way they treat me and he is being judged in their behaviour. He is upset over this.

I can only hope he has really seen the light and things start to change.
On the plus side i had my own fun annoying BM with sd 8 smile and a high five instigated by sd8 in front of her mum!!!