"Glory to the Step-Son King!"

(to the tune of Hark! The Herald Angels Sing)
(Disclaimer- this song is merely poking fun at step-life. Apologies if anyone offended. Also realize 18-and-out isn't always true but was trying to remove a line from the song)

Hark! Dh family sings,
"Glory to the SS King!"
"NOT MY KID!" you want to shout
too bad DH didn't "pull out"
Oh how hard the step-mom tries,
See the hatred in his eyes;
Drink so you don't lose your mind,
SS RULES! (You must be blind)

Hark! the latest studies sing,
"Divorce rates skyrocketing!"
Skids think they're adored by all:
Fascist little wrecking-ball;
Drop off time? He's always late,
Sex life? Nope, just masturb***
Sad that we just couldn't see;
18-and-out you might be free:
We try to not make step-life hell,
For our souls we truly sell!
Hark! DH family sings,
"Glory to the SS King!"

Paychecks and credit cards are maxed!
Make sure for nothing SS lacks!
Crap, you spent the water bill
Finances are all down-hill
look away when he rolls his eyes,
"we are fine!" DH lies,
Re-discover your self-worth,
Can't afford a second birth.
Hark! DH family sings,
"Glory to SS, the King!"

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Comments

THIS is amazing I just sang

THIS is amazing I just sang it twice out loud - I’m loving it but not the crappy situation obviously.

It's a little dark but I

It's a little dark but I giggled into my wineglass as I typed }:)

Please take a bow that was

Please take a bow that was hilarious! You missed your calling if you don't do this for a living haha! }:)

Bravo!

Lost it!!!!!! Great job!!!

Drop the mic!

Loved this! Totally agree you

Loved this! Totally agree you should team up with Aniki and do a duet!

Aniki better be careful.

Aniki better be careful. She's got some serious competition on the carol-writing front.

Well done!

Twelve Days of Christmas was

Twelve Days of Christmas was funny. But making fun of the birth of Christ is not. Pick a song that is not about the birth of Jesus. I realize you don't like your SS but Hark the Herald Angels Sing Glory to the Newborn King!

Not trying to offend, was

Not trying to offend, was merely picking fun at step-life not the birth of Christ hence trying to remove anything Holy in the song. Merely borrowing the melody. I don't dis-like my ss its Step-life that gets me down. Apologies to you queensway

Lieutenant Dad I am sure that

Lieutenant Dad I am sure that many many more made up Christmas songs will be coming. If you rattle the cage you never know what will come out.

“Skids think they’re adored

“Skids think they’re adored by all” really hit a nerve with me. At first, it made me laugh, then I realized just how true it was. My skids are constantly seeking praise, which they receive from everyone. If they were my kids, I’d be so disappointed in them, though, so I have to resist to urge to tell everyone that really, they aren’t that great.

It's just something I've

It's just something I've noticed from being in two relationships with people that had kids prior. I think it comes from bio parents feeling SO guilty they are almost blinded to anything the kids can do wrong, it almost gives them a "get out of jail free" card and the kids aren't dumb they pick up on it pretty dang fast and use it to their advantage. Bad behavior? Nooo...my child isn't a monster, it's because OP isn't in the picture full time like when we were together! That's why! Extended family are extremely guilty of this as well, I've noticed a huge difference between how the child in the "broken home" is treated on the holidays vs the kids still in a "happy family".

I died. You might have just

I died. You might have just mad emy day. Even though it also all hit close to home. LMAO

Woman, I snorked coffee up my

Woman, I snorked coffee up my nose!!

Plenty of us can relate to some/most/all of these things!!

BTW, I understand you're trying to poke for at step life and had no intentions of offending anyone. Firstly, sometimes we have to laugh or lose our minds. Secondly, not everyone is religious or follows a religion involving Jesus Christ. I know atheists, wiccans, Odinists, and one druid. {{hugs}}