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SHE DID WHAT?!

LuckieGirl35's picture

Now, I know this will seem so petty to what we ALL have going on but it was the first time in my short 2 years of being a Stepmom that I realized I am completely hopeless in some situations.

We've been in and out of court with the BM. If she isn't trying to move out of state, she wants more money. If she doesn't want more money, we wants more time...etc. Just anything to keep the drama going in out life.

But for the first time on Sunday, I realized she found one thing that she can do that kills us both. My SS7 has the most beautiful hair ever. We love to keep it long. She says she feels like a princess when we curl her hair. And everytime she does get a hair cut with the BM, she calls. (Which is very nice. We always ask her to keep it long maybe just get a trim.)

We'll we have been going through a nasty court case....She threatens to get a restraining over if we don't answer our phone when she calls 5 times a day. We are in the middle of an investigation because she says our house is unfit. (We just bought a 1800 sq. ft. house. for the 3 of us on a golf coarse. She has her own room and loves all the kids on our street. MUCH BETTER than the bed she sleeps on in her mom's bathroom at her mom's parents house!!!) And she is trying to move our SD away to Washington. There is NO family there. She just says she can't afford it here. (You live with you parents dear and don't have a job....maybe thats why your struggling) SO whatever, it's just ugly for us right now....

We go to pick up our SD on Sunday and SHE CHOPPED OUR SD'S HAIR!!!!!!!!!!! It is literally a bob. I doesn't even touch the back of her neck and barely goes to her chin!!! I am SO sad. We have family pictures next weekend and her hair is gone!!! Sad (Trust me, I know this will grow back and it seems so petty!! But I am so sad!!!!)

Whats worse....We talk to our SD daily and SHE DIDN'T EVEN TELL US! When we ask why she didn't tell us, she just says "I dont know" And when you ask if she likes it she says "I wanted to cut my hair, my momma didn't make me." (Funny, we didn't ask if your mom made you)

I know this is something so little....but the court, I can handle....The police, I can handle.....the investigations, I can handle....I have nothing to hide. But the hair cutting.....I can't even fix that! UGHHHHH!!!!!!!

VioletsareBlue's picture

That poor kid. Her mother is a horrible person for putting her in the middle like this. She thinks she is doing it to hurt her ex, but it really is the kid she hurts.

cat72196's picture

Awww, honey, that's not petty. That was a low blow on BM's part. I'm sorry. Sad You can bet your ass she did that on purpose to upset you, but what she may not realize is how much she manipulated the child! She didn't TELL you b/c she knew you would be devastated! And you know darn well BM said, "Now if (you or husband) ask if I made you do this, make sure you say no." Ugh... what a jerk... Sad

C J Baughn's picture

The investigation against you is not both ways? or did they appove of the child sleeping in a bathroom? I used to work for CPS in my state (Indiana) and that is a health code violation as well as unfit living conditions. I can not believe she would have the gull to call a report on you when she's living that way!! how ignorant!

LuckieGirl35's picture

The investigation is both ways. But the court only ordered a partial investigation which is background checks, phone interviews, etc.

LuckieGirl35's picture

I know!!! I tell my Fiance all the time. She is doing this to get a reaction from you but all she is doing is hurting our SD.
Like this whole thing with moving....She told the daughter she would buy her a horse if she moved with mommy and she would be able to fly home and see daddy every month. So our SD has picked out names for horses....It is so sad!!! And the BM doesn't have a job!! Let alone money to fly her home once a month.

Thats not even half as bad as last year when the BM called and told my Fiance she was pregnant. He said "Congrats, I am happy for you" Our SD got on the phone and was SOOOOO excited to be a big sister!!

The BM called us the next day and said "I am not really pregnant. Just wanted to see what you would say if I had a family with someone else."

Why would you ever do that to a child!!!!!

RaeRae's picture

It's not petty. Bm is a bitch. My skids BM does something similar. She allows her psychobisexualhusband cut my two SS's hair. They are only 7, they can't really say 'no!' (although one has absolutely refused to allow the man near his hair lately).

Thing is, we are the custodial parents, and have requested over and over for them to leave the boys hair alone, let it grow back and be 'cute' again. The boys, one in particular, need longer hair... the faces just do not 'do' short, buzzed hair. They are much cuter little boys with bangs and some length.

Not to mention the psychobisexualhusband always jacks up the cut. Strings left here and there, even patches of hair, parts where it is buzzed completely to the scalp while the rest of the head is around 1/4 inch. Just looks horrible.

The asshole 'stepfather' even told SS7#2 this past weekend that he looks like a shaggy dog.

Bunch of asses. I hate it when NCP's do this crap. Or when a CP does it just to piss off the other parent. They don't realize these kids have feelings too, and don't want to go to school or around friends looking like trash.