I've got a son I have full custody of. He has 2 kids around the same age he has half time custody of. We usually go to his place when it's his turn with the kids and spend one or two nights there over a weekend. Our kids haven't been getting on and it's been like this on and off since we started going out nearly 2 years ago but it seems to have become worse lately.

My son will do something that annoys his daughter. She feels excluded because my son and his son play xbox games that she doesn't like and doesn't want to join in on. It got to the stage a couple of weekends ago where my son wouldn't give something back and she was so annoyed she started choking him! My son can be annoying and defiant - I know this better than anyone - but still.

Anyway it got to the stage where his daughter told her grandmother (her mum's mum) that my son had poked her in the chest (she's just started developing boobs) and that she wanted to move in with her grandmother. She's apparently said to her dad that she doesn't feel like she's got a home. I think there's stuff going on at her mum's as well. Back to the poking thing. My son absolutely denies it and I'm pretty sure he's not lying. I think the father begs to differ on this but as I said to him why didn't she say something to one of us at the time like she does with everything else that annoys her.

We didn't catch up with them last weekend and my partner said it was like he got his daughter back! I feel like he's laying the blame squarely on my son and isn't prepared to accept any responsibility from his own kids. He has said he's willing to discuss options but what options are there?

I've suggested we all sit down together and have the 'family meeting' but he reckons that won't work!

I'm at my wits end. Anyone had a similar experience or have any suggestions?