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Need advice - how to make things "uncomfortable" for skids

paul_in_utah's picture

Submitted by paul_in_utah on Wed, 01/04/2012 - 2:36pm

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General Discussion

Now before anyone gets up in arms with me, I'm not talking about hurting or demeaning children. What I'm talking about, is how to do you make it clear to skids that they are not welcome to live with you forever?
The reason I am asking is all of the horror stories about adult skids who never leave the nest. There are dozens, if not hundreds, of posts detailing lazy, entitled adult skids who live at home into their late 20's or eve 30's, and make no effort to etablish their own home.

My SD17 is heading down this path, and I truly do not want her sticking around past high school graduation. My DW, a card-carrying "friend" parent, coddles and babies SD17, and does not require her to do any chores. As you might guess, SD17 is quite comfortable, and is firmly entrenched in our house. I am thinking that there needs to be a pretty significant "environmental" change that will alert her to the idea that the gravy train will not run forever, and that she needs to be making plans to get the hell of out dodge. So, this is my question for StepTalk - what should I attempt to do to get SD17 out of her comfort zone?

3Libras06's picture

Submitted by 3Libras06 on Sat, 01/07/2012 - 9:41am

I literally LOL'ed on this one. That is funny and I am sure it was pretty dang effective.

twopines's picture

Submitted by twopines on Wed, 01/04/2012 - 2:51pm

Public displays of affection to your wife. Lots of them.

Ask her to look at something on your foot.
ex. "Hey, can you see if this is oozing?"

Ask/tell her to bring you stuff.
ex. "Hey, since you're going into the kitchen, bring me a beer will ya/fix me a sandwich, will ya?"

Eat her food.

As Druzilla mentioned, sit in your underwear, leave the bathroom door open.

unsure99's picture

Submitted by unsure99 on Wed, 01/04/2012 - 3:07pm

Love it!! Im sure I'm gonna need to remember these. My FSD will never want to leave our house. I mean why would she when she gets to stay up all night, sleep all day and daddy brings/goes gets whatever she wants to eats and brings it to her!! Hell I wouldn't want to leave either!! It will be up to me to RUN her off!!

Auteur's picture

Submitted by Auteur on Wed, 01/04/2012 - 3:40pm

Not that we were spoiled stay-in-the-house-forever types but my mother used to throw out anything I had without asking if it wasn't in the right place. So basically what Maux is saying. . .but definitely take her advice and junk it in whereabouts unknown!! And like Maux, Starfish would loudly vacuum during TV. Of course if your DW is anything like GG, he'd tell you to stop vacuuming in a heart beat so as not to disturb his "angels" watching TV!!!

liks's picture

Submitted by liks on Fri, 01/06/2012 - 10:00am

GO BUY A 1 BEDROOM CONDO AND GO LIVE IN THAT...PUT YOUR BIG FAMILY HOME ON THE MARKET....

Thats what my ex husbands parents did....hahaha They had a lovely little innercity apartment....I think they rented it and rented out their home in country.....got rid of their adult son and daughter....

Shannon61's picture

Submitted by Shannon61 on Fri, 01/06/2012 - 5:57pm

Set rules and ride her when she doesn't abide by them. Spend time behind closed doors w/your wife and make intimate noises, and talk or laugh loudly on the phone when SD is around . . preferably when she's watching her favorite show.

I used the vacuum cleaner trick often. SD hated it and would close her door. I hid the laundry detergent . . forcing SD to buy her own, and basically made things as miserable as possible so SD wouldn't want to live here anymore. I also insisted that DH stop including her in our meals and wouldn't allow him to bring her food home if we went out to dinner. If he had his way, she'd have lived with us forever!

It took a few years, but these things finally got SD out . . . . at the ripe old age of 27!

amybeth33's picture

Submitted by amybeth33 on Sat, 01/07/2012 - 5:57pm

I have told SS17 and and DH then when he is 18 and either gradates high school(unlikely) or gets GED he is gone. I remind him of this alot..and DH kinda argues with me..I said..well you can go with him..this house is in my name..and your daughter my SS15 who is normal can stay here...and I mean every word...

sterlingsilver's picture

Submitted by sterlingsilver on Sat, 01/07/2012 - 10:47pm

Loved this topic. Gave me some great ideas }:) for "preparing" ss18 for life.

sterlingsilver's picture

Submitted by sterlingsilver on Sat, 01/07/2012 - 10:48pm

Loved this topic. Gave me some great ideas }:) for "preparing" ss18 for life.

bananashake's picture

Submitted by bananashake on Mon, 01/09/2012 - 8:52am

Have wild, loud, noisy sex with the wife.

Cook breakfast, lunch and dinner for the wife naked.

Shag in the living room, bathroom, etc so she can see.

Walk around in the buff at all hours of the day.

Change all the locks on the door so she has to knock every time she shows up.

She'll be gone in two weeks.