Weddings, funerals, graduation parties?
Forums:
What do you do? Family having a wedding, funeral, graduation party (big events, not just an everyday gathering). It occurs on the opposite parents weekend. Do you make a switch? Not everything can be planned according to a custody schedule. Or does the child miss out?
I am curious how this is handled by others.
I would make exceptions for
I would make exceptions for things like those, especially funerals. My grandmother died of cancer and the funeral was scheduled on my dad's weekend (my grandmother was my mom's mom). I was very close to her. I would have been pi$$ed as hel1 if he didn't let me go.
I know many people live and
I know many people live and die by the CO but we don't. I try not to make my kids have to miss out on things just because their parents are divorced. My ex and I work together to make it easy whenever possible. Unfortunately that's not the case for everyone and the kids suffer.
We run into this a lot
We run into this a lot because of basketball games, soccer games, cub scouts, birthday parties, etc. We don't normally switch: we tell BM about the activitiy and tell ss10 that we expect him there. If BM chooses not to take him, that just makes her look bad and damages her relationship with her own child because 99% of the time, he wants to attend these activities.
Major events? We never let
Major events? We never let skid miss out on those with her mother, although of course, mom had no problems with her daughter missing out on our end... lol But, that does NOT mean we switched weekends...If it did NOT compromise what we had planned for other weekends, then we would gladly swtich...but if we had plans for an adult evening, party, vacation, etc...and thus the kid would either not go to whatever event in her mom's side, then we did not switch. Of course, she complained about my DH missing out on his weekend, to which he quickly then told her...good, then we won't switch at all and I guess you won't have her for the wedding, funeral, blah, blah...
I think whoever has the kid has the CHOICE to decide if they will switch weekends or just miss out. That is why my DH was NON-CUSTODIAL...it's not that he's non-custodial but the custodial runs the show...
DH would swap weekends for
DH would swap weekends for special occasions.
I am not planning it, yes I
I am not planning it, yes I do my best to schedule on our time. But some things just don't happen on our days
PS - scheduling on your days
PS - scheduling on your days only works until you have your own kids...ie. no, I was NOT going to change my son's birthday because we had to wait until skid was there and mom would not switch...SKID never had to wait for her mom to have her for her bday, mom just canceled on dad and celebrated on the day closest to her bday...My bio kid deserves the same.
We only schedule on our time.
We only schedule on our time. For things that are not on our time, SS doesn't go. BM won't be flexible ith us, so we don't with her. Thankfully no funerals or wedding have come up.