Need advice on how to deal with jealousy, resentment for BM
I realize that by marrying FDH there are things that will NOT happen like having a child together or buying a home anytime soon due to the amount he pays in CS and my job has had a freeze on salary raises for 5 years. I found out that BM is building her dream home and I could not stop the tears. I felt this absolute ugly, selfish, jealous, resentful side of me like I've never seen before.I Love FDH but this weekend I almost broke off the engagement over this! WTH Is wrong with me? He can't control it yet I was yelling and crying at him! I rationally know that material things are not what is important in life and that it is possible for us to buy a home ONE day but I couldn't stop this emotion. Does anyone else whose SO pays ALOT of child support get these feelings ?
I do not have pms---lol.
I do not have pms---lol.
No CS here for the adult
No CS here for the adult skid. But it pissed me off royally when DH gave homeless skid money to stay in a hotel. I've give up manicures, pedicures, etc and we live in a very, very modest ($100,000) condo to save money. BM has a great job and a paid for house. Why doesn't she provide for her little crotch dropping?
No wonder I hate her guts.
I would not say I am jealous
I would not say I am jealous per say. But rather I have been blessed with children I could never have of my own. Our BM had in court records that we live "MODESTLY" because we have a big screen TV... and because we driver nicer vehicles. We live in a mobile home because we can not afford to live in a HOUSE.... yet, she lives in a $100,000 home, just put $30,000 into the basement... has about an acre of property... But we are living modestly... Really?...
It is all BM delusional justifications to raise CS so she can sit on her fat ass and do nothing but leech off some one else... Her DH had an inheritance of $50,000 that she bragged about "wasting" in less then 6 months... But we live modestly... Really....
The more jealousy and resentment you carry towards her, the more control she has over your life. I know the cards that have been dealt SUCK... but you are the one that chooses to allow her ignorance to make you unhappy...
My DH called his kiddos last
My DH called his kiddos last night as he does every night to say goodnight. His oldest mentioned to him that they got a new car today. A 2012 BMW E SUV!!!
After talking my DH off of the roof - I mentioned to him that it really doesn't matter. Althought it pisses me off to know how hard he works and the $3000. per month CS he pays and we can't buy food until payday.
Does it suck - YES! I could care less what I drive as long as its safe. I am not one to get something so I can keep up status like the ex. My kids have a home full of love and a husband to keep me warm at night. For the EX - she is alone and the SUV can keep her warm. Enjoy paying that sucker off! I have way better things to spend my money on.
My advice.......let it go! Let it go! Repeat, breath....Let it go!