My 15 year old step-daughter is absolutely miserable to be around. When in public, she doesn't speak and appears to almost be in agony. So in turn, I am miserable and in agony. How do I handle this without flipping out on her??
I agree with @dtzyblnd. This behavior is normal so ignore it. Dealing with the behaviors and moodiness of teenage girls can be extremely challenging. Good luck!
When they don't want to talk they don't want to talk... I am sure you can remember a time in your life you didn't want to talk... well Teens especially ones who have been through divorce always seem to have the weight of the world on them...
That is standard teenage behaviour...
I have helped raise two girls from 5 & 6 they are now mid twenties... so I did the full teen years...
I am now with a woman and "Working with" 15 and 18 year old girls...
They are MOODY... half the time you don't know what is really bothering them... if they have text messageing... you'll never even hear conversations that are bothering them...
STAY POSITIVE ALWAYS... Unless they do something outright wrong..
Breaking some rules, making a mess, being sullen are all average teenage BS...
Things I don't tolerate...
Lieing
Swearing AT mom, me or sibling
Hands are always to oneself... car has stopped and teen asked if they want to walk?
Worked wonders for me...
The one thing I tell my new girls... ALL THE TIME....
Thank you for sharing your mom with me... So they hear I am NOT here to take her away...
I tell them I love her... and I know I am not their father... but...
I will NOT let them disrespect the woman I love...
Just as they shouldn't let me disrespect her...
We are a team the three of us making her happy...
Make sure your SD knows you are there for her... Never push... just let her know you want a good relationship with her DAD, and Her...
They don't think their own parents love them during the teenage years...
It will be hard to convince them you love them...
But as caring Step Parents we all know we care
I use the rule... Be available, supportive, be kind, but don't be a push over
praise the things you like or the potential you see in them...
It never hurts to tell them you care about them...
but NEVER expect a response... NEVER...
Keep your expectations LOW on that... even as a parent..
Especially as a STEP Parent
I agree with @dtzyblnd. This
I agree with @dtzyblnd. This behavior is normal so ignore it. Dealing with the behaviors and moodiness of teenage girls can be extremely challenging. Good luck!
I Tend to AGREE...
I Tend to AGREE... Ignore...
When they don't want to talk they don't want to talk... I am sure you can remember a time in your life you didn't want to talk... well Teens especially ones who have been through divorce always seem to have the weight of the world on them...
That is standard teenage behaviour...
I have helped raise two girls from 5 & 6 they are now mid twenties... so I did the full teen years...
I am now with a woman and "Working with" 15 and 18 year old girls...
They are MOODY... half the time you don't know what is really bothering them... if they have text messageing... you'll never even hear conversations that are bothering them...
STAY POSITIVE ALWAYS... Unless they do something outright wrong..
Breaking some rules, making a mess, being sullen are all average teenage BS...
Things I don't tolerate...
Lieing
Swearing AT mom, me or sibling
Hands are always to oneself... car has stopped and teen asked if they want to walk?
Worked wonders for me...
The one thing I tell my new girls... ALL THE TIME....
Thank you for sharing your mom with me... So they hear I am NOT here to take her away...
I tell them I love her... and I know I am not their father... but...
I will NOT let them disrespect the woman I love...
Just as they shouldn't let me disrespect her...
We are a team the three of us making her happy...
Make sure your SD knows you are there for her... Never push... just let her know you want a good relationship with her DAD, and Her...
They don't think their own parents love them during the teenage years...
It will be hard to convince them you love them...
But as caring Step Parents we all know we care
I use the rule... Be available, supportive, be kind, but don't be a push over
praise the things you like or the potential you see in them...
It never hurts to tell them you care about them...
but NEVER expect a response... NEVER...
Keep your expectations LOW on that... even as a parent..
Especially as a STEP Parent