Help! Baby on the way and 2 stepkids
Hi everyone! I'm new here, and need some help. Luckily I know I will have the support of people, and won't be judged. My soon to be husband has to kids from his previous marriage. They're 6 and 4. Luckily they're very well behaved but I literally hate being around them. I dread when they come, and I could only imagine what it would be like if they were spoiled brats. To make matters complicated, I am 8 weeks pregnant, so I can't exactly just walk away from everything. I love him, I chose him, the kids just kind of came along with the package. I'm having a problem because my parents are giving me their 3 bedroom home. Am I wrong to want to put his kids in a room in the basement? The room is bright, and my brother used to sleep there, so it's not some dingy area. I want my baby to have his/her own room, and I want a guest room. This may make me selfish, but I don't see the point in wasting a bedroom for his kids when they're there 4 days out of the month. Thoughts?
Well we haven't moved yet. We
Well we haven't moved yet. We are still living in a two bedroom apartment. I know I'm being a brat. I like the idea of the toy room though. I guess for a couple years it would be okay to have them upstairs. If they came over more than every other weekend...there is a barn on the property. HA I'm kidding
My stepbrothers never had
My stepbrothers never had their own room in my mother's house. They shared a sofa bed in our den, which was on the lower floor. No biggie.
Do you really think your BF
Do you really think your BF will agree to that?
If someone tried to get me to put my kids in the basement while a bedroom sat empty,I'd tell them to go enjoy the house. I would find a place of my own.
The kids are well behaved and they are not brats. You have hit the SK jackpot. If you can't handle the fact that the has kids, move on.
BASEMENT!!! BASEMENT
BASEMENT!!! BASEMENT BASEMENT!!! PUT THEM IN THE BASEMENT!!! My SO has two kids also. 9 and 11. We have a 2 bedroom home and they take the second bedroom. I HATE IT!!! His kids are here every other weekend and 2 separate weeks in the summer... to me it is a waste of space to give them the other bedroom in our house when it could be used much more by us if we put his kids in the basement. Not to mention, if it is "their" room that is where they will want to spend their time with their things. If it us upstairs you will see them more often. If it is downstairs they won't be constantly under your feet. Don't worry. They won't be scared of your basement. Make it a nice place for them and let them have their things down there. It will be cool to them to have such a private place!!
My SO is on board with putting his kids downstairs in our house because he agrees it is a waste of space for them to be up here. Not to mention cramped. They are 2 boys sharing a smallish room with all their games and toys. They would have more room downstairs but we need to build a room first so they aren't sleeping in the open!!
Make a list of pros and cons with your SO. See what you come up with. Some part time Dads are at the stage where they want their kids closer, some are at the stage where they are already drifting apart a little just due to being apart a little more.... those are the ones you want to pounce on with this one!!!
Why don't you just let them
Why don't you just let them use the guest room when they come over? My skid come over every other weekend and when we were planning to move into a 2 br apt I was planning on making the extra room a guest room. Since skid doesn't technically lie with us I thought it was ridiculous to make it his room. Anyway now I'm 9 wks preggo so my bf has decided it will be 'the kids' room. Though it will
Mostly be the baby's since skid is only with us every other weekend...
As much as I hate to say it
As much as I hate to say it because I totally know what your goin through right now ! I would have to say put them in the guest room for the four nights they are staying with u for, if I had your prob that's what I would do mainly because at 4 and 6 unfortunately they are bit young to be in the basement and second if u throw them in he guest room for those nights hen u still have that other room for whatever u want and u don't have to waste it! Problem solved! :). And btw you are so lucky they are well behaved, I'm dealing with a ratty never listens wont stop talking 6 yr old boy who has been diagnosed with ADHD and possible mental handicaps as he seems to have the mind of a 3 yr old in a lot of ways and a speech impediment I can't barely understand what he is talking about half the time! And the kid does bad thigs every 5 mins that he knows he shouldn't be doin !! I've caught him lots of times and he has huge look of guilt on his face and pretends he wasint doing whatever he was up to mainly destroying my house carpets, closet doors, walls, u name it... Not to mention his BM is a total hag!! Hate her guts with a passion!! By you wanna trade kids? Lol anyways sorry to vent! My first time on this site! Hope my advice helps u girl!