I don't know what to do.
I have a SS13 almost 14, and well to put it blunt he is a spoiled, selfish, ungrateful little boy. It's not that I hate him, but more of I just can't stand to be around his attitude,and smart mouth. He only comes summers, but I have him alone the entire summer except for one week. DH isn't home until after 5 in the after noon. I understand that a SP shouldn't be the one to punish, but what am I suppose to do? HE thinks he runs things, and that he is the one in control. Last year we didn't have to worry about my son picking up his behaviors, but this year my son is old enough to start learning from him. He thinks I am his maid, and he doesn't have to do anything! HE hates going outside, and all he wants to do is sit in the house and grouch. :O :sick: What do I do? How do I make him listen?
DISENGAGE!!! He is old enough
DISENGAGE!!! He is old enough to get his own bf, entertain himself, clean up etc. after himself. DO NOTHING FOR THIS KID!!! Then when DH gets home and sees what his kid has been up to and what he has/hasn't been doing he might just start getting on his skids ass!!! Here's hoping!!!
I agree with Cheri and Tasha.
I agree with Cheri and Tasha. I had the SS15 full time in the summers while DH worked for 10 years (was easiest when I was working full time), and it was hell trying to keep him entertained--until I stopped trying. It finally dawned on me that nothing I did for this kid would ever be enough. Now that he's 15, I pretty much treat him like an annoying roomate (he moved in with us full time in Oct--long story for another time). What Cheri said about the game system and TV--that has been a sanity saver for me. As for food, he can live on hot dogs and Hot Pockets since everything I cook is shit (What IS this?? Do I have to EAT it?!? Nope, live on hot dogs). I quit, and I feel so much better in that regard. Now if I could just find a way to minimize his negative impact on the little ones, I'd be great.
As far as picking up after him, I suggest keeping everything of his you pick up in a safe place, hidden away. When he asks about it, you can have him do something helpful to you to earn it back one item at a time. After about one month in action, this plan seems to be working in my house. Good luck!!
In my house all children are
In my house all children are treated the same, mine or his. I understand this doesnt work for some ppl, but it is the way it works here. There are times that I am here with my ss and bio children when dad is at work and the same with him. We made the agreement when we moved in together that we have rules in the house and All children will follow those rules or there will be reprocussions, whether that be by me or dh. The kids get it for the most part, i still here the typical "your not my mother" and he is right I am not, but he is in my house and he will follow the rules of the house. I and greatful that dh sees it the same way I do.