Advice for a know-it-all child
Maybe y'all can help me with this. My SS9 is very smart and I love him very much. However, he can drive me insane lol. He thinks he knows everything, that he's always right, that he has to have the last word, that if he's in trouble it's because it was SD13 or SS11's fault. He's the baby of the 3 and I think Bm treats him like he's the baby. When he gets his mind on something he wants he will NOT stop pestering about it. A good example is his weird obsession with wanting to own chickens. He's constantly asking us to buy chickens (we live in an apartment) or if we buy him chickens he will keep them at his mom's house (BM lives in an apartment). Another example is if he decides he wants a game, OMG he will not stop asking for it and it makes me want to slam my head into a wall. We have tried to talk to him, grounding him (with this one is will pester us about when his grounding is over or try to strike a bargain with us to get out of it), putting his nose in the corner, ect. GRRRRR
He can be an outright smarts. I know he is ADHD but so am I. He acts this way even on his meds.
Help please before I loose all my sanity with this child.
Thankfully, we never give in
Thankfully, we never give in to his pestering. If we say "No, you can't have this game." he will wait a few hours and ask again. Or he will wait until we are out of the house shopping and ask, or asking his grandparents when we see them. We have tried to make him understand what all is involved in having chickens but making him physically do it is a great idea. DH's has uncles that have chickens so we can make SS9 do all the non-fun things with him.
What he hates the most is being grounded from video games. He will cry and throw a damn fit at times if he's grounded from them. He will then try to bargain with us to let him back on the games like "If i'm good for an hour can I get back on the computer?" or "You said I was only ground until tonight, that means I can get on the computer when I wake up?" when he's actually grounded all weekend.
This boy could drive a dead man to commit suicide.
"Somewhere along the line he
"Somewhere along the line he has learned that if he pesters you, DH, or BM long enough you will give in just to shut him up."
i have said that to my dh until i was blue in the face. i've told him that all they have to do is hold out until he caves.
if ya'll dont cave and he's just that relentless, see if it bothers your dh. just ask him outright.
turns out the pestering doesnt even phase my dh so it is something that will never change. just figured out a way to laugh at it.
if it DOES bother your dh, maybe he could follow what my parents did. my brother was really bad about sassing every.single.thing.they.said. one day while bitching about dish duty, dad said "ok if you dont knock it off i'll add a week on until you stop muttering." he kept on. "theres another week." and kept on. "and another week." (all said perfectly calmly from the couch while watching tv.) bro kept on until he had three months of dish duty. }:) after that he learned to quit doing something when he was told to!
maybe your dh can try that. for ex- "no chickens. end of story, conversation over. do not mention it or bring it up to anyone- me, kat, g-parents, anyone. if you do, then (insert consequence)." and just keep adding to it. but the key is, he'd have to absolutely follow through.
DH is really good about
DH is really good about getting onto when he acts like this (especially the pestering) but I swear nothing fazes this child. He'll act right for about a day then go right back to his normal behavior. I promise we do not cave to his pestering, he's that relentless and he waits for the opportune moment to pester. He's smart but stubborn as hell. I think he should be a politician or in big business when he gets older with that relentless mouth and bargaining.
what's the custody
what's the custody arrangement like?
We get them every other
We get them every other weekend.
ew. that's really not enough
ew. that's really not enough time to enforce anything, as u'd have to start everything all over again every stinkin' 15 days...
unless the bm is on board with it. but it seems consistent consequences between both households is nearly impossible, esp. if she'll be carrying the bulk of the effort to hold him to it.
sorry!!!!
my only advice now is to just perfect your glazed over *crickets* look.
)
(since my dh doesnt mind the pestering, i've got that look down solid
*Sigh* this child is going to
*Sigh* this child is going to be the death of my sanity
My bios do the same thing and
My bios do the same thing and it drives me crazy BS10 "Mom can I have a snack, mom can i have a snack, mom can I have a snack" He's a know it all and ALWAYS has to have the last word even if its "K" He's my bio though, so it doesn't bother me THAT much. I love him, its part of his personality, and we are working on it.
When he pesters me, I tell him if he asks me again, he's not getting it at all, AND I follow through.
With his know it all attitude I call him on it, really ? Show me? Prove it to me, look it up and when he finds he's wrong he just gets a big smile on his face. After a few times of that, he started to slow down with his debates and made sure he checked his facts first.
I'm so glad I'm not the only
I'm so glad I'm not the only one dealing with this lol. I've tried to have him show me he's correct but even if he's wrong he simply changes the narrative of how he's right. AHHHHHHHH!!!!
OMG did you kidnap my
OMG did you kidnap my yss?????????????????
:jawdrop:
i couldve written your blog post word for freaking word!!!
Lol got any advice I hope
Lol got any advice I hope
i commented above
i commented above
Have you tried pestering HIM?
Have you tried pestering HIM? Clean your room, clean your room, clean your room, clean your room, clean your room, clean your room....
I have found with SD8 that if she does something that drives me nuts and I do the same thing back to her, she 'gets it' and stops. She used to CONSTANTLY 'forget' to do things DH and I asked her to do. When we'd ask if it was done we heard 'oopsies, I forgot!' every single time. So when she would ask me to do something for her, I wouldn't do it. And when she asked about it later I'd say 'oopsies, I forgot!'. She got the hint and started doing things we asked her to do, and almost never 'forgets' anymore.