ex-MIL threw BM under the bus without even knowing it ...
For a few months now we've gotten the impression from BM's mom (who lives with her full time) that she's not as involved in BM's drama as we thought. We initially assumed she was feeding a lot of lies and BS to BM, encouraging her to get as much time away from DH as possible. As a background, she had 4 different kids by 4 different men; only 1 of them currently speaks to her and that's the one fully supporting her now (BM).
Anyway .. recently, BM had denied DH his upcoming two holiday weekends because she has a baby shower planned for Feb 17 and a spa day planned for Jan 20.
Well .. BM's mom send DH an email last night asking if he would mind dropping the girls off for an hour or so on Feb 22, because she is throwing a baby shower for BM and would really like the girls to participate, even if just for an hour or so. She said BM knows about the shower, but she's trying to surprise her with an appearance from the girls.
DH agreed to drop them by for an hour so they can participate; but I don't think the surprise will last. DH is printing the correspondence to include in discovery as one more instance of BM lying and denying his days for NO reason.
Ammunition! Document,
Ammunition! Document, document, document. Let her crazy show in court.
And honestly, would a spa day
And honestly, would a spa day with the skids trump dad's visitation anyway?
She's saying she needs this as bonding time with them before the baby comes, but she has them the majority of the time as it is.
Who gives a shit what she has
Who gives a shit what she has planned? He gets his time, tell him to take it. She does not get to dictate his extra visitation.
According to her and her
According to her and her attorney, she does. She has to "approve" any "request for additional visitation".
He plans to exercise his time without a doubt .. doesn't change her opinion that she's entitled to deny it.
Oh he plans to get them.
Oh he plans to get them. He'll take them to the baby shower for an hour or so (probably less because have a birthday party that same afternoon) as a good faith showing. Plus, I'm sure BM will be going on and on and on to them about how it's so unfair their dad won't let them go ... and they will undoubtedly be bummed.
As much as I dislike BM and want to do her NO favors, the skids would really enjoy being there. This is the first baby sibling for them, and I don't want to interfere with this process for them, know what I mean?
But .. if BM keeps it up, DH will likely nix the entire thing and tell her mom we have other plans (which isn't a lie). Skids probably won't miss the baby shower when it's being replaced with a super fun age appropriate kid bday party.
Why would the MIL plan a baby
Why would the MIL plan a baby shower on dad's weekend anyway? I don't know if I would send them early or do them any favors, I find their entire antics to be ridiculous.
She doesn't have any weekend
She doesn't have any weekend time; she offered him every weekend when she relocated back to MD and got remarried. He's offered multiple alternates to the custody agreement to allow her weekend time, but she refuses. She will except nothing less than primary/sole custody; reducing him to every other weekend and half of summer.
You and me both .. she
You and me both .. she doesn't honestly see it as DH's CO'd time .. because she thinks she has ultimate veto power to deny it.