My wife (her 4th marriage, my 2nd) and I had been married for 2 years when her 24 yo daughter and 2 children (4yo an 6 mo) came to live with us "until she could get on her feet". I agreed because she was in a bad situation. She had been in jail when we got married and supposedly needed to move here to get away from the Mexican mafia. We helped her find a job, which she still has. After 2 years of the daughter providing no household help, help with any bills, or buying any food, my wife had ME removed from the house because I was not nice enough and loving enough, and was in fact "mean" (meaning I tried to discipline) the kids. We got back together after a few months and some counseling, and then my wife bought her daughter a house very similar to, and down the street from, ours to get her out of our house. She did that for me. All three names are on the deed and mortgage, but my wife pays 100% of the mortgage. The daughter re-paid her mom by having a 3rd child. The daughter has never been married, each child has a different dad, none pay any support. After they "moved out" we still kept the kids - only every 3rd weekend according to my wife, but I kept track and its more like 2 - 3 weekends a month, and we feed them dinner a total of about 9 or 10 times a month.

I move out this weekend and she has filed for divorce. I admit I was never remotely fond of the grandchildren, and this one daughter is a train wreck. I actually resent their continued presence. For the first 2 years, all I saw of my wife was the back of the 4 yo head, as she was alwasys sitting on my wife's lap, facing her, and if my wife would move her head to talk to me, the child would move an stay in front of her face. That's how starved for attention these kids are. I once told my wife I felt like out life was on hold because of them, and she told me that her life wasn't on hold at all. I feel like she abandoned our marriage to take care of her adult child. We had 2 years togeteher, the last 7 have been spent raising these kids and paying bills for the step child. The step is in a dead-end job and makes $12 an hour, she is now 31 and "dating" a 21 yo (that means the grandkids spend the night with us when their mom has "date night".

I wish that I could be the loving grandparent to these kids and make my wife happy, but I am not that person. We had dated in high school and waited 33 years to be together, and then to have our time repalced with grammy time, was just more than I could take.