Why would you want to invest in something that is not yours? Your name should be on the house. You need to have security that the home you live in is yours. If anything happens to your dh you would have enough to worry about without the added stress of where you will live.

I'd also like to know how your assets are protected if something happens to DH. You need an attorney to do this.

What your FIL needs to do is speak to his own lawyer, minus both you and your DH. This man needs his own legal advice and his own desires met. If he's having troubles making his mortgage he might consider something like reverse mortgage. He can look into several different cost savings financial ways he, himself, can afford to pay for and remain in his home. If he's only got five years currently to pay, he probably doesn't have a whole lot left mortgage wise vs the value of the home. Odds may be that his current mortgage has a much higher interest rate than what he could now be offered.

If the guy just wants 'company' an someone to cook his meals, why do all this adding on an letting you/DH on his part of his deed? Perhaps he'd have you move in free of rent in exchange for doing his cooking and cleaning? Of course though there would no 'interest' to the house and property. DH would have to wait until his father passed and get the regular share along with DH's siblings. Which is actually a much fairer 'deal' to all concerned. What if you or DH decided a year from now the guy is just too much of a pain in the ass to live with? What if FIL decides he can't stand living with you? Why tie the three of you to one house (which is the FIL's current and past home he almost already has paid off)?

Not to sound judgmental or mean, but you an DH are looking at this as an investment an goo deal for yourselves along with trying to figure out how to protect that investment blah blah....somebody needs to make sure the old guy's best interest is what actually indeed is happening (it's his home!)and that the old guy is protected along with how he wants his estate to go in the end. I suggest FIL consults with his own lawyer immediately prior to going any farther into you all talking about this an that he also gets his estate planned and put into documentation along with a will.

You need to make sure you understand the difference between having your name on the mortgage and on the deed. Having your name on the mortgage obligates you to pay the loan - it does not make you the owner of the house. To have ownership you need to have your name on the deed.

Good luck - it sounds like a complicated situation!

Nope, do not enter a mortgage on this property until you are added as an equity owner of record. You get all of your home related costs back plus 1/3 of the valure of the home upon FILs demise. DH gets 1/3 and his sibs split the last 1/3. Is how I would insist on it.

When my Granddad passed my dad made a deal with his cousin that if my GM could stay in her home until she passed or had to move into a nursing home that my dad would sign the house over to the cousin and his wife when my GM passed if cousin and his wife would care for GM in her home. Cousin's wife was a licensed elder care provider. For a few years my GM stayed in her home but when it became clear that cousin and his wife were not caring for my GM adequately we moved her to a retirement home near our house several states away. Dad gave the cousin an option to buy the home at a very good price but since GM had to move out due to lack of adequate care that cousin and his wife were not getting the house unless they purchased it.

How about instead of taking a portion of the house as reimbursement for taking care of fil, he pays you directly for it? That way while he is still relatively self sufficient he just pays a little towards any general house upkeep, cleaning and meals. But if his health declines then he pays a higher amount for any care he needs that you provide. If your fil sets up his finances so that his sons all have power of attorney then they can oversee what you are being paid and will know that it is a fair rate. You and your husband can pay rent to your fil for living in the house, that money can help cover any loan he needs to get to pay for renovations. Then when fil dies the house is split 3 ways, you have already been paid for your work looking after him. If fil's care becomes too much and he needs to or wants to move into a care home then the house can be sold and it is still in his name so he can fund his care and your husband and his brothers don't need to worry about it. If you and your husband have the money at that time you can buy the house from him then. This seems like a fair, open and honest way to set everything up so that you are all protected and everyone can see that they are treated fairly. If you divorce your husband you have already been paid for any work you did caring for your fil. Each brother gets his 1/3rd of your fil's estate and can see that they have all been treated equally. And fil remains in control of his money and house as long as possible and has the ability to pay for extra care should he need it in the future. You and your husband still have the option to buy the house later on if you can and want to.