I don't know if I can keep this short. We never married, thank god. We had know each other for years, and started dating. He asked me to move in. After approaching my son who is now 4, and his two kids, for typing purposes, SS now 15, and SD now 11, and discussing it, my son and I moved into his place. BM is a wreck, but a very manipulative and smart wreck. When I moved in BF and ex had 50/50 as did I.

SS was and is a wonderful kid. Respectful, smart, funny. Him and I enjoyed many of the same hobbies, and we never had an issue. I was told by BM and BF that SD has issues since we was 4, before the divorce which occurred when she turned 5. SD initially very nice to both my son and I. I did notice that she was very clingy with her dad when his attention was on anything other than her. I expected this and it didn't bother me. What did bother me was if my BF told her to clean her room, do her homework, pick up after herself, that was enough for her to go into full meltdown mode. Screaming, throwing things, running to her room and slamming the door. After this went on for 3 nights in a row, I sat down with her and my BF and told her that I understood that she was upset, but this behavior wasn't ok. Especially the slamming the door part. I have a cousin who's sister slammed the door and didn't know his hand was on the frame. Cut the finger clear off. SD literally slammed her fists down on the table and ran to her room, slamming the door. BF went into her room to talk to her, I don't know what was said. 30 minutes later she came out and came over to the couch and laid over my BF.

When school started I experienced what BF called "the trail of SD." As soon as she got home from school she kicked off her shoes in any direction, backpack in the middle of the floor, clothes as well. She would make a snack and leave the milk on the counter. If she took fruit snacks or a granola bar the wrapper would be left on the couch or the floor. I'm not a clean freak, but my son always throws his garbage away and puts utensils in the sink. BF would tell her to clean up, and every time there would be a melt down and every time he would go into her room to talk to her. One night he didn't close the door, and I heard him apologizing to her saying he was sorry he upset her. He then gave her money so she could go to the mall with her friend and buy something to take her mind off "from all of the stress."

A few months later during the week at their mom's BF gets a call from SS saying "mom is acting weird again. This time we're scared." Now this has apparently happened several times before I moved in. Ends up BM is tripping on Ativan. BF goes to court on Monday and gets emergency full custody. SS is happy and doesn't want to go back to his mom's. Even after she was in court ordered rehab and taking random urine tests, he wants to stay with his dad. SD on the other hand is upset. I felt bad for her because even when she wanted to see her mom, she didn't want to go to her place, she wanted her to come to ours. BM would find any excuse not to come visit. When she did, SD was fine; when she left she melted into continuous tantrums to the point her own brother wanted his sister out of the house.

Since the beginning SD would come into our bedroom at night pretending to sleepwalk at first. Later it turned into "I can't sleep. I need you to sleep in my room daddy." BF did eventually get tired of it after 6 months, and told her she was old enough to stay in her room. One night she walked in while we were having sex. We didn't hear her, but BF looked up and she was there watching us. BF told her to go to her room and stay in it. She screamed she was going to come in again and again until he slept in her room. I went into our bathroom and when I came out she had propped the kitchen garbage can between our door and the frame, standing there with her arms crossed. She woke up my son and her brother in the process. Nobody slept.

SD always complained about being too sick to go to school. We lived 2 blocks from the school; a park was between our place and the school, you can see it from the patio. SD refused to walk, BF gave her a ride everyday and made SS walk. During one of her "sick" episodes, she stayed home an entire week. She was emailed a homework packet and was told to return it the following Monday. When BF was dropping her off BF went into the school to deposit some money in her lunch account and the principal pulled SD and him aside. She asked why SD didn't hand in the homework packet. BF said SD told him she didn't have any homework. The principal told him she emailed it, and SD responded saying she would bring it when she returned the school the next week. SD then went into full tantrum and started claiming she was again too sick to go to class. BF made her go, but picked her up from school and took her to get ice cream and apologized for her being embarrassed in front of her friends.

The last straw was the day she ruined my son's birthday because she wasn't going to get presents, and the same day stole our phone chargers. The night of my son's birthday dinner she got into a fight with her brother and proceeded to kick a hole in her bedroom door. I wasn't having any of it so I took my son and met his father and had dinner. When I got home BF asked me if I had seen our phone chargers; we always had them on the end table. I said no, but I would look for them tomorrow. As I was picking up SD's clothes from the floor, low and behold under a pile of her dirty clothes were our chargers. I called BF at work and informed him. He said we would sit down and talk that night. He gets home, SD is upset from fighting with her friends at school, the talk never happens. An entire week goes by and I bring it up again. He gets SD from outside and we sit down. He asks her why she took her chargers, and when he asked if she had them told him she didn't. BF tells her I found them under her clothes in her room. SD responds: "WHY WAS SHE IN MY ROOM? THAT'S MY PROPERTY!" BF tells her that I wouldn't be in there if she put her dirty clothes in the hamper. "BUT YOU ALWAYS PICK UP MY STUFF FOR ME! WHY WAS SHE DOING IT?" BF explains to her that that isn't the point. "THEY'RE JUST CHARGERS DAD. JESUS." BF responds and this is the night I packed up my stuff and left... "I asked you if you took them and you said no. You mis-spoke honey." The he proceeds to give her money so she can "calm down and buy something nice."

Oh and I totally forgot about Christmas, when SD went on and on to my son about how she was going to Build a Bear to get him one. Then came home with two and said "I changed my mind, but I'll give you money to get one."

Not worth it. Not even a little. I regret staying as long as I did.

He called me just a few days ago to tell me that she had to repeat the 5th grade, and that he was sorry that he let his enabling go on so long. Informed me that he's taken her to another counselor after the last one refused to see her anymore. I said thank you and hung up. Not my kid, not my problem.