Haircut
Ok so mostly a rant but advice always appreciated.
So general background, my DH has full legal (medical, educational and geographic) custody, shares 50/50 eow visitation of SD7.
SD7 has come the last three of our weeks with lice, her mom claims she is getting it from our house, we have a BS4, he has not gotten it and neither have I (DH is bald), while we disagree, we treat her, the house, the cars, the toys, lines, towels, clothes, my son, myself each time, we do preventative shampoo, the kids don't share hair brushes, etc etc
She went back and came back again with lice from her Mom's house. So we asked her what she wanted to do, she asked to have her long hair cut off. She said the treatments hurt her head and she really wanted to do something "cool" with her hair. So we treat her again (the second she gets to the house, straight to bathroom), then when she is bug and egg free we take her to get her hair cut, DH lets her pick the haircut. Her hair goes from below her shoulders to a pixie cut.
5 days later, no signs of lice at all on her. DH drops her off at BM's house. They talk and BM flips out. Now the background to her, is while they where going through the custody fight, BM only cared about child support (which she lost) and SD7 hair, which the judge says isn't a legal issue and refused to even listen to.
SD7 looks adorable and we live in the South so short hair is great in the summer, it bums me out that BM only cares about her hair cut and not the hygiene part.
I have been a step mom for 5 years, I try to stay out of the parenting decisions that don't concern me or my house (her behavior and routine in our house, I of course have a say) but this pisses me off, BM did zero to fix the issue and I of course am the one picking through the kids hair for eggs and bugs, we are spending money on the shampoo etc. I never communicate with her, but man oh man do I want to tell her off this time. I wont but the text has been written (and deleted)
Ok rant over, if anyone has dealt with a situation like this advice, words of wisdom would be helpful.
First, ignore BM's rants,
First, ignore BM's rants, it's just hair, and if SD is happy with the cut, who cares.
Second, you say she "keeps coming back with lice" but in reality, she probably just has never gotten rid of it fully yet. Lice these days mostly can't be treated with the over the counter medicine, and that medicine doesn't kill the eggs, which is why it's so important to treat every week (I believe that's the instructions), so that eggs that hatch to bugs are then killed too. So your options on how to treat the lice are to either comb/pick through the hair EVERY DAY for probably about a week to get rid of EVERYTHING, or go to the doctor for a prescription treatment.
Both my SDs (9 and 11 at the time) had lice for about 6-9 months "on and off" (I put that in quotes because in reality they probably just never fully got rid of it). We honestly stopped doing the treatment stuff because it's super unhealthy and didn't help anyways. I literally would spend at least an hour on each SD EVERY night going through their hair layer by layer. It can be very difficult to see the nits (eggs). Also, buy a tea tree oil shampoo, it won't treat the existing lice, but it will help keep more from coming as it's a deterrent.
Good luck!
Thank you, I will try your
Thank you, I will try your suggestions, I never thought about the doctors and tea tree oil!
I agree about the BM rants, the kiddo loves her hair so thats what matter.
pffft ignore BM - let her
pffft ignore BM - let her rant and rave as much as she like.
SD wanted short hair, her father agreed.... nothing to do with you
Now to be sure SD never gets lice again, buy her tea tree shampoo, she might have infected BM's house and BM is not washing the blankets etc, thus she will keep on getting lice.. tea tree shampoo keeps it away..
yes buy now 2 bottles of tea tree shampoo and only pay for 3... (this part only added cause I sound like an irritating TV advert)
Oh lawd!! We went through the
Oh lawd!! We went through the exact same thing with SD. 2 years constant head lice and BM refused to cut her hair. It was nearly to her bottom when she was 4 years old. It was always in a unbrushed rats nest bun on the top of her head when we'd pick her up.
SD was always begging to get her hair cut shorter. It gets really hot here too. DH finally got sick of it and told me to take her to get it cut. We only cut 6 (very damaged) inches off. BM flipped. SD's hair was still to the middle of her back. Fast forward 6 months, CPS came down on BM for neglect and DH was granted sole custody.
First order of business after the ink dried on the CO was a hair cut. SD picked a shoulder length bob. A week after the haircut she started asking to get it shorter. She picked a pixie that was longer in the front and short in the back. She totally rocked it!
SD has only had head lice twice in 3 years now. Both times it was after a long weekend at GBM's house lol.