What is up with this attitude??
What is up with this attitude I keep getting from BF about just "getting over it?' It's like when I come to him and say what is hurting me...how I feel about the psycho drama all I get it ""What do you want me to do about it?" and just "get over it?" like I asked for this? arghhhh I feel so alone.
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You are not alone
Read some of the posts here. I came here when I was hurting and confused. Believe me, your pain is real but that is what a support group is for -- they help you laugh and smile -- and while you are doing that, you get through the pain.
Because he is a man
there is no other reason. Men are all assholes. Even the great ones have that little (no pun intended) asshole in them that refuses to understand us. Let him get over it after you are good and ready! I think they don't realize just HOW MUCH is on us as the good little wifey that handles their crap, their kids crap, and their ex's ex. Go figure. Keep your chin up. We all love ya here
I understand
My husband does the same thing. We have NO control over the situation and every time I get down and out, he questions my loyalty.
Our pain sometimes is worse because we have to watch the most important other person in our life get beaten down when he doesn't deserve it - we have to watch and bite our tongues not to make the situation worse. We may be strong women in every other aspect of our lives, but then there's these situations we all have in common.
"Water continually dropping will wear hard rocks hollow."
They want us to "get over
They want us to "get over it" because dwelling on it only reinforces in their minds what screw-ups THEY are for putting all of us in our respective messes.
~ Anne ~
"Love, having no geography, knows no boundaries."
(Truman Capote)
You know...LOL
You know every single one of you is right!!! LOL GoingCrazy....mine admits he is one...Colorado, what you said bites to the quick because that is exactly how I feel, I just couldn't put it in words, and it sucks and it hurts so bad... but a lot of my stress and pain is from watching as this unfolds and trying to be there to pick up and restore life after the "storms". Anne LOL thank you so much for making me laugh because right now just thinking about that mind blowing statement helps me gain some control back to my inner sanity...I'm not perfect but I didn't come into this relationship looking for this... as none of us did....i wasn't out trying to hook up with the man with the most problems or the craziest ex...I can honestly say though that sometimes I wonder if it is because of me that some of this stuff is as bad as it is on him...Things were bad for him with his ex long before I came into the picture, but it went through the roof afterwards....I have been told by him and family members (even her family members) that it would not have mattered if it was me or Judy Jane or Betty Boop she would have done exactly the same thing...she doesn't want him but doesn't want anyone else to have him...that blows my mind...is it an issue of letting go for these women or the fact that they can be replaced or that they are jealous in some way...? I don't know... but this place is the best...for comfort and support and venting and sharing....you guys are the best!
......psycho ex's suck!....
Devils advocate
It was the same here , DH always got over things faster and after a long time I finally understand that its because he dealt with it for six years before I came around so he half expected it and there was no shock value to him but me on the other hand was always thrown in those first several years by the extent BM would go to.