Advice needed on Halloween
Halloween is one of the holidays I'm starting to dread and are hoping ya'll can give me some advice.
We have my SD's EOY for Halloween. We live in a wonderful Normal Rockwell like neighborhood which makes it a great place for trick or treating. So great, in fact, that BM came with last year, and has every year since we've lived there. Yup, that's right, my SD's, my 2 kids, my DH and his ex and me all trucking around. It was horrible. She kept shooting passive agressive comments about snacks for the kids, tried to parent MY children, came back into the house to "review" the candy and just tried to be a part of my family in a way that wasn't OK. Even the neighbors have said "that must be weird" After last year I said never again.
So here we are to this year. It's her year to have the kids and more than likely, my SD's will want to come to our neighborhood to see their friends and TOT with my kids. So what do I do:
* take my kids and find somewhere else to go? (my first instinct at this point)
* let the kids trick or treat where they want but make a big point (ie make my DH do it) of her not walking with us, not coming in the house, etc.? (this is sure to be met with MONTHS of manipulative behavior by BM as payback including have to answer countless times "why don't you like mommy?")
* just suck it up, let the SD's go where they want with whom they want and not make a big deal out of it?
Thanks for your help everyone!
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Comments
I'm with vickmeister
Make sure you're not at home when the trick or treating starts. Go out for dinner or something before hand. Make sure that you give plenty of time for the skids to get started with their trick or treating. Then go back home and get your kids ready to go. Make sure that you're still trick or treating when the skids are done. Then they can take their candy home and let Bm go through it there.
Good luck!
Dawn
here here
Chose another route. Start earlier or later than you normally due then you can avoid BM. As much as I love my FSS, I would not want to do any activity with BM. That's just weird and sort of co-dependant creepy. How rude of BM to try to parent your children and police the candy. Can you say get a life and take care of your own kids on your watch.
Happy Halloween!
I "third" the motion
One year is a fluke. Two years sets a pattern- and a BAD one, in this case!
Go with your kids...alone.
"If you have never been hated by a child, you have never been a parent."
-Bette Davis
i absolutly love haloween and would not stand for that
she probly thinks its ok for her to parent your kids because after all you parent hers she wont see things the way you do!
she maybe trying to show you the way she feels about you parenting her kids
i say go to a different neighbourhood to start with. then go back to your own !
make sure you already have a word with your DH to not let her near your house and that you want to enjoy haloween with your own kids and not have to bother of BM's drama beforhand just incase u do bump into her. all the best x x x
thanks for the advice ladies
I'm making plans to do something else. DH says he understands, but clearly doesn't understand the depth (but he's not me so I really can't expect him to) But it just sucks that I have to change my plans because she has no perception of boundaries.