Of course you can!! Especially if you ha full custody. If she can't be respectful of you she doesn't get to talk to her son - period!!! She doesn't need to call at 10 pm either. I wouldn't answer the phone either when she calls that late.

Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist. - George Carlin

i think every parenting plan has a clause that states something like neither parent can interfere w the childs "frequent and meaningful contact" w the other parent. BUT this is not a get out of jail free card. its YOUR home and you need to set boundaries. have ur DH ask her to call between certain hours, ie. not at 10pm, and to be mannerly when she calls. if she doesnt adhere, u can probably file a motion to AT LEAST get it so that the hours are restricted. they may even be now...check the PP. she may be violating it by calling so late, in which case, file a motion of contempt.

"Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life."
~the late great George Carlin

In fact, our BM isn't allowed to call our house phone. She has been so mean and disrespectful, that I had our number changed, and made unlisted (the house phone is in my name). She did phone the new number once, and was a total biotch, so as soon as DH was finished with the call, I reported it as a harrassing call with the phone company. DH sent her an email, and told her that she is to call his cell phone ONLY, not the home line (I don't need my kids answering a call from her by mistake, and getting an earful from her), and that the call to the new number was reported to the phone company as harrassment. She hasn't called the home line since. We prefer she call the cell (and DH only uses the cell to call BM or skid as well) because there's always a record of the calls - not so easy to do with a lan line.
It pisses BM off - she asks DH at least once a month why she can't call the house line. She's such a control freak, and definately does not like to be told that she's not allowed to do something... Funny thing is, since the phone is in my name, it's up to me if she can call, not DH - and she's doesn't have the cahoona's to ask me why... }:)

No lawyer or anyone else has the right to tell you that you have to be disrespected, especially in your own home. I would clearly address to the lawyer that she has access to the kid, but must obey the following guidelines:

1. Show some respect when she calls to include ASKING to speak to SS and not demanding.
2. Do not call after XX o'clock unless it is an emergency.
3. In the event of an emergency, she needs to tell you or DH what the emergency is so that you can determine if it is worth waking or riling SS up about at such a late hour.

I would add any other rules that may apply to your situation.

That is BS no one can treat you like crap and the courts or Judges allow it.

People who get on HIGH Horses will find the fall to be painful. ~ME :->

about this, as I dont even speak to the BM...or didn't. She doesnt call the house anymore since SD has a cell phone, but she wont even call the house when SD's phone has been taken away. She always calls with this fake.."helloooo, is Sd there?" then I just hand the phone to DH or Sd. More often than not, I do not even answer it anymore (caller ID is a wonderful thing).

get caller id (if you don't already have it).

When she calls, have SS answer. If SS isn't there...don't answer.
I also wouldn't engage in the game playing because at that point you're handing her an excuse to be a bitch on a silver platter. I never go toe to toe with BM, not from fear but from the fact that she is more vindictive and more conniving than I ever could be. And it's not my fight....it's DHs.

I just think "demanding" respect is futile when regardless of the circumstances, she's never going to respect you.

If she continues to harass your household, simply change your phone number and instruct her to always call DH's cell phone. My skids BM did this for a while because I covertly stopped answering the phone whenever she called.

Just suggestions from a girl who prefers to keep the peace.

"For every ailment under the sun....There is a remedy, or there is none;
If there be one, try to find it; If there be none, never mind it." ~ W.W. Bartley

I could not live without caller ID. If SD isn't with us and her number comes up I give it to H to answer. If he isn't home I don't answer it. SD isn't calling to talk to me and if it is BM I don't care to talk to her for ANY reason. If it is an emergency with SD then she will leave a message. She only calls our house if she's tried H's cell and he doesn't answer. As for the respect, I agree with CG- it will never happen. I would kindly have your DH explain that nobody at your house takes calls after 9pm. Our BM would call 10:00, 10:30 and even 11pm when our son was a baby just to tell us SD wasn't feeling well or some stupid excuse to call and annoy us. He put a stop to that after she woke up the baby every time and I made him deal with putting him back to sleep. Even if we are eating dinner or doing something as a family now he answers and says SD is eating she will have to call you back or we are busy right now she can't answer the phone. 95% of the time SD forgot to call her back. She got the hint after several times and doesn't call on "our" weekends anymore.

simply hanging up if she's rude and then waiting a few (minutes, hours your choice depending on how big a beotch she was) and allowing skid to call her back. You're not keeping them from contact, your just keeping her from thinking being disrespectful to you is going to get her anywhere.

I had a little fun with BM recently concerning the phone. We have custody she has EOW and Thursday night visitation. She calls one evening while I'm doing homework with the skids and starting supper. I answer the phone even tho caller ID says it's her. This is our conversation:

Me: Hello?
BM: Are the kids there?
Me: Yeah . . .
BM: . . .
Me: . . .
Finally, BM: Well can I talk to them?
Me: Sure

Hand the phone to SS and they start chatting. I just wanted her to remember she's not in control of everything anymore.
But then she gets on the phone with SS5 and makes him cry for not being there with her or some crap, so I felt like a total POS and will never do that again. His tears dried up in two seconds after getting off the phone with her, so maybe the tears were just for her benefit. I didn't ask and he was fine the rest of the night.

Absolutely a disrespectful caller should hear nothing but CLICK. Whether they are the XS/BP (Xspouse/Bioparent)or not.

I would say that the test of reasonableness applies. If the caller is behaving in a reasonable manner (calling at a respectful hour, speaking in a non-abusive tone, etc) then take the call, if not ............ CLICK!

Best regards,

I'm really starting to get pissed off, I hate the fact that these woman decided to move on with their lives, but to a point. Why is it so important for them to dictate what we can and can't do even if we don't listen. How would they like it if the table was turned. Call them during the week at 10:00 pm and ask if dear SS had dinner and is in bed. Ask to talk to them.

Sorry just going off... }:)

I think the best thing to do would be to say in a very calm, even tone that yes, they can speak with her, but from now on you would like her to be friendlier when she calls, and that you go to bed around 10pm so calls after that time aren't acceptable. Then if she calls again and is still rude simply say, I'd be happy to let you speak to him, but you'll need to call back when you can stop being rude, and hang up.....something like that. But don't yell at her - be the bigger person and show her how ADULTS are supposed to act.