16 year old SD pregnant! And it gets worse
My SD16 is pregnant. She and her boyfriend, who is also 16, are apparently thrilled about the baby. :sick:
DH was upset when he heard the news. He took it even worse because she just moved back in with BM three weeks ago. BM had her but gave her to us for two years, seeing her only on weekends, then wanted her back full time. Now, because of state law, we'll be required to not only pay child support for DH's grandchild, but if she goes to college, he'll be forced to pay until she graduates. I'm sick thinking about it. Our youngest child is disabled and so money is very tight. Adding this to us is going to really hurt financially. We've been talking to our lawyer about it, seeing if there is a way we can get out of this. But he's not optimistic. Even our second opinion was disheartening.
My parents have offered support. But that could make it worse. 
I haven't read any farther
I haven't read any farther but what state do you live in!???
It's called palimony and it's
It's called palimony and it's acceptable in Africa if the biological father cannot afford maintenance due to various reasons.
OP refers to State so it may
OP refers to State so it may well be acceptable in Anerica too.
Hmm I personally don't agree
Hmm I personally don't agree with that law. I don't see how a boy's parents are more liable than a girls. And quite simply put Sal I don't think either sets of grandparents should be held accountable. The 2 consenting people who made the baby are the only ones responsible for that predicament. You wanted to do the funky chicken dance you own what comes your way. I knew that when I was all of 16 and realised non adults had sex out of wedlock
I would think the father of
I would think the father of the child would pay CS thus transferring those costs to the father's parents. Assuming the mother was going to be caring for the baby. This is really stupid, because your kid gets pregnant under age youre on the hook for that grandchild until 18..Insane.
I knew there was a law for
I knew there was a law for parents of a man to pay support if a) the girl was underage and b) the sperm donor couldn't pay support. We nearly had to pay that. Thank goddess the little ding dong miscalculated and the baby was born after her 18th baby.
This post is my worst fear
This post is my worst fear realized. I sincerely hope a good outcome is on your future. This isn't fair at all!!
Why would a grandpa have to
Why would a grandpa have to pay child support for a child that isn't even his? MSD had a baby when she was 17 and DH DID NOT have to pay CS for a kid... that wasn't his... We are in the US. In Ohio.
Maybe OP is just jumping the gun and assuming???? Her DH will have to continue to pay CS on the SD but not her baby. And if he is forced to pay CS- holy shit! That is like the worse law ever.
And didn't I read somewhere
And didn't I read somewhere that they are starting to sue parents if their children commit crimes?
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I think that has always been the case. Back in the olden days, if a kid committed a crime, you knew the parents would be embarrassed enough to make their kids repay what they did. Now-a-days, too many parents think their little special snowflakes are perfect and the victims have no choice to go after the parents for restitution.
A big reason I won't marry until skids are 18.
I remember a thread about
I remember a thread about this as well, but I thought it was Unfreakinreal.
If you are in South Carolina,
If you are in South Carolina, it's possible to encourage them to get married, but the boy being 16 throws a wrench in things as his parents would also have to give permission.
"If you are under 18, you will need a certified copy of your birth certificate and a notarized statement of parental consent. The minimum age for a female is 14 and it is 16 for a male."
Here's teen marriage laws by state:
http://www.usmarriagelaws.com/search/united_states/teen_marriage_laws/
Thankfully, that's not the
Thankfully, that's not the case in NJ or else I'd be screwed. I know how some will flame me for this, but, if my son had been a girl? I would have dragged him/her by the hair to a clinic without a second thought.
They need to marry this girl immediately and that way not only does she no longer get CS, the Dad will be off the hook for the grand baby CS too.
Sally - It is honestly my
Sally - It is honestly my only saving grace that BS is a boy. While him being a teen dad is nothing to sneeze at, the reality is that the mom has the harder job, as do her parents because she and GB live under their roof.
I would not have taken no for an answer if the roles were reversed. A clinic and immediate birth control would have been her one and only option.
Seems like teen pregnancies
Seems like teen pregnancies are on the rise again. So sad. While I am head over heels in love with my GB, I still wish my son hadn't done this to his future. Thankfully, he's still on the right path and is leaving for college in 6 weeks. It's still not what I would have wanted for him, you know.
I thought long and hard about
I thought long and hard about the college thing. I have a LOT of male friends that were in my BS's situation many years ago. They ALL told me the same thing. "I wish I had left for college. 4 years go by fast, and then you have the rest of your life and your child's life to provide and make it up to them. If you are willing to help with the baby while he is away, let him go to college, it's what I wish I had been advised to do."
Getting a job flipping burgers is of no use to GB, it is a temporary fix. We are thinking long term.
I never heard of a man paying
I never heard of a man paying child support for a child that he didn't seed. Let the boy that had the fun getting the hoo ha bust his ass to support both the young adult and baby. When a person makes a adult decision to spread them legs then both needs to be an adult.
Your DH having to pay child
Your DH having to pay child support for a child that is not his is B.S.! I get, he may have to pay half of any medical not covered by insurance...but only for SD...because this is required regardless of what the "medical condition" is. Now, I'm not sure where the OP lives, but on the plus side, should SD decide to go to college, she could probably get grants out the ass, and college not have to cost a cent! Having a baby may actually save DH money there...maybe.
Time to tell that boy what I would have told my son if he had knocked up a girl in high school, "Son, time to get a job!! You got responsibility! No more hanging out with your friends. No more sports. You made this bed...literally!"
I have no advice. But I can
I have no advice. But I can honestly say this sounds like a nightmare!
And I've definitely heard stories like this before. I always feel so sorry for the parent having to pay for their kid throughout college and their grandkid. It's insane.
Interesting that Dad is more
Interesting that Dad is more concerned about the money than he is about how HE screwed up as a parent. 'Cause that girl did not get knocked up during the two weeks she's been with Mom.
Poor kids.