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Am I crazy or is she?

wizeguy1032's picture

My GF and her 2 kids and their 3 dogs live with me. Her kids are a 21 yr old daughter and a 7 yr old son. The kids and the dogs have taken over the bedroom and the Gf does nothing to stop it even though I have voiced my displeasure often. The kids will almost every night end up laying in our bed with the dogs and their mom. Many nights the 7 yr old will end up sleeping with us. The dogs almost always end up in the bed. Am i crazy for not liking this? The GF constantly reminds me her kids are her life and she wants them as close as possible.

12yrstepmonster's picture

Given a step situation I think it is perfectly acceptable to say no kids and dogs in bed. The only child that was allowed to sleep in bed with DH and I was our natural joint child- and he still didn't like that, but it was out of sleep desperation as the child was 5 before she slept all night.

somerg's picture

imo, if she lives with you it's YOUR rules, she dont' like it, she can leave............right?

NCMilGal's picture

It took me 2 years to break one of the dogs from sleeping with me - then I realized she was sneaking onto the furniture (instead of her perfectly good bed) at night, and I'm back to sleeping with both of the boneheads until DH moves back in.

Kids though... Past nightmare-age kids? I don't have bios, but I wouldn't want that. And hell to the NO to the adult kid in my bedroom!

Anywho78's picture

I have no BK's but have 2 dogs, FDH has 2 resident kiddo's aged 7 & 8. Skids are NOT allowed in our room (I explained that everyone needs their own space)...he doesn't like dogs in bed so we both made adjustments Smile

mommy_of_4's picture

Before my husband and i got together my babies all slept with me. It was somewhat important to me. When we got together we decided that being in our bed wasn't going to be happening. It was really hard for me at first but our bed was the one place where just the 2 of us were together. When we ended up having our daughter together, he allowed her to sleep in our bed quite a bit because she was a preemie and he felt she needed the contact..LOL...she is almost 5 and i guess she still needs it. But I put my foot down and now she only sleeps in our bed once in a while as a treat,but he allows my BD6 to also sleep in the bed. As for my step kids, they were never allowed in our bed. I wasn't getting into my bed with someone elses kids and I respected the fact that he was not comfortable having my boys in the bed. You can be close to your kids and not have them in your bed. my kids are my life but they are just fine sleeping in their own beds. I feel for you, i really do cause I couldn't do it...especially someone elses kids

Asher10's picture

i never understood the co-sleeping thing and I know I never will.But I can't knock people who feel the need to sleep with their kids.
BUT i can tell people that sleeping with dogs in the bed is unhealthy.Google it.There's evidence that it isn't good.I love my furbabies more than anything in the world but they sleep on the floor.I think the girlfriend is taking the more the merrier thing a little too far and you need to talk to her gently about why you have issues with it.appeal to her romantic side and let her know a couples room is a sacred place for the two of them and it should be filled with loving energy and sexual energy.NOT kid love and dog love.save that for the public areas of the house.

clueless1's picture

I am having the same type of issue, I am moving in with my boyfriend, and his kids feel free to walk in or follow us into the bedroom- this is our sanctuary and I don't think kids should have free reign to go and do whatever they want... there needs to be boundries and the bio needs to support that- if she is so set on sleeping with her kids (which I think 7 is getting a little old for that...) then she should sleep in their room and keep your room your sanctuary!