Annoying
Every time I notice something my st daughter 12 does that bothers me a little I try to mention to my husband, he gets all bend out of shape. I don't want him to be hero and fix it.. I just want him to notice with me so our minds can function as one the next time she tries to paint me as the villain when MIL or FiL is over, even Infront of friends. I sometimes wonder if they are buying into her shit stirring ways. For instance, she knows I buy the exact same brands and type of things but she says like, " this toothpaste gel taste funny" or " what kind of bread is this" it's the kind I buy because it's what we eat. Am I suppose to buy a special type for her and only her because she is here for 2 or 3 days then it gets ruined? It already aggravates me she orders a 17.00 shrimp platter and takes a few bites and says I'm full. She also knows I can't stand her half sister that isn't allowed over here anymore so she stays on the phone her mom got her snap chatting and taking photos or videos of us so her sister can coach her into saying stuff or how to act or what to say to get under my skin. Another issue and I'm venting here.. The MIL and FIL are divorced. He had a wife but he's retired. His wife works so he gets bored and every off day husband had he has to make a point to call or try tomatoe plans. The MIL lives by herself and she also makes plans to do something with us. It's like tugga war between them two. It's so nice when it's just my husband and I alone doing something besides just sex. I don't care if it's just us riding in the vehicle looking at the country without his phone going off. I'm sure step d feels that way sometimes and would like just her dad and her but it can't be that way because he's a busy man. Oh well, thanks for the vent.
Sorry for the spell checker
Sorry for the spell checker changing words and the confusion.
You know that dad could take
You know that dad could take the phone off sd during her visit right? She does not have to have it on her at your place.
Then I would be being petty
Then I would be being petty
Easy fix. Confiscate her
Easy fix. Confiscate her phone as soon as she arrives for visitation. She gets a 15min call every evening to BM. No SnapChat... etc.....
End of problem.
No need to include DH in discusion beyond "If you do not like how I parent and discipline then step up and get it done before I have to. Otherwise... STFU and we will discuss your issues offline when it is just the two of us."
My SD13 was doing the same
My SD13 was doing the same thing at restaurants, ordering expensive adult plates and not eating it. So I started getting her kids menus, and forcing her to order off it.
Alternatively, at locations without children's menus, I would allow her to order an adult entree that she thought she could finish, if she didn't, the leftovers were for her next (appropriate) meal.
Cell phones go in a basket downstairs, and she's permitted to call her mother if she wants to, and can even do it privately, but none of this hiding in her room texting mommy all day. You're here to see your father, go change the carburetor with him.
I didn't bring up things I found annoying about my SD with my DH, I brought them up to SD in front of DH, she's a human being with average level comprehension, I didn't insult her, what I'm saying now is how I feel, not how I approached it with a child. Chewed her gum with her mouth open, I'd say, "1st warning, chew your gum with your mouth shut. If I have to tell you 3 times, the 4th time, your gum goes in the trash." -- and I'd follow through. She ate like a cow that had a stroke, so I filmed it secretly on my cell phone and showed it to her and DH, she doesn't eat like an afflicted cow anymore (I was lucky enough we were near a toddler that was eating horrendously, so I compared her to the toddler). I'm alienated from EVERYONE on my husband's side of the family because of how I "treat their precious little princess."
Fuck them. She has a clean bedroom, she dresses like a respectable young lady while at my house (because I make her take off the grunge nasty shit her mother allows her to wear the moment she walks in my door), and she has good manners.
I don't care if I'm the evil stepmother. I told my husband I would no longer associate myself with him and his spawn in public if she didn't conform to being a pleasant young lady around me, and he was welcome to have to return to being single if he didn't like how I wanted a pleasant middle class home.
I'm not June Cleaver, but I'm not permitting a CHILD to dictate the level of class in my home.
"I'm not permitting a CHILD
"I'm not permitting a CHILD to dictate the level of class in my home". Fully agree with you!
Stop buying bread when she is
Stop buying bread when she is there at all, lol.