I hear loud and clear! I never got support except here and there and I never took him back to get more. I felt like he had to take care of them if he ever was a dad and he would need money too.

I as mom and a smom know that it takes 2 people to have a kid and 2 people to SUPPORT that kid! My dh's ex refuses to get a job saying being a mom IS her full time job and her youngest is 12! She makes me sick as she thinks my dh should support her and the boys for the rest of her life! So when she screams how broke she is and expects dh to give more money i just want to tell her to get a job so she can out in her HALF of supporting the boys and support herself instead of trying to make dh support her and the boys 100%!

I never did this to my ex nor did I ever ask for more then CS or tell him CS wasn't enough to raise a child as it is not meant to be but more that it is his HALF to support HIS KIDS not me.

YES!!! That is what we have told BM over & over & over. Every time she calls she says, "Well, $400/month is hardly enough to raise 2 children on. It's chump change compared to what a lot of other fathers are paying".

Okay, first, DH pays $450, so don't try to discredit what he's doing.

Second, it's the amount YOU agreed on to stay out of court.

Third, if it's chump change, why do you call when it isn't on your doorstep THE day you think it should be there.

Fourth, it isn't intended to be enough to raise 2 children on. It's intended to be DH's share to go TOWARD raising 2 children. If you need more, GET A JOB.

I hear you about the CS - I only get it every couple of months and it is backed up in the thousands; which I will probably never see. Before we had SD - we paid at least 250+ sports, clothes etc; now that we have SD FT we have only receiced 55 bucks w/in two months.....ugh! I think some BM think it is owed to them; and some do deserve it. I don't think if you have a bio that is willing to be in that childs life that $ is everything. It kind of makes me sad to think that my BD doesn't even know her Bio - I would give the $ back for her to have him in her life... but since the A* hole doesn't give a penny and has since adopted his wife's children - SCREW him; I take him for all he has....I guess every situation is diff. I just don't think CS should be looked at as a meal ticket. BM used to take our money and pay her water bill!! I know, I know, it doesn't matter what they spend it on; it just used to make me sooooooooo mad!! Cuz then SD would come to us for stuff her mom didn't get her!!

http://www.lotsofkids.com/LOK-Features/Articles/costchild.php

If you want to be on a budget it can be done. This shows you that you don't need a TON of money or even the amount of CS that bm 'thinks' you need to raise kids. As I have no many times that they just need to take the average of what it costs to raise a kid and split it in half and if you have more than one do take the average of the increase and split that. That will stop money hungry woman from taking their exes to the cleaners!

Honestly it is not right to make the CS up0 just b/c the father got a raise he can have his kid benefit from that raise while he has his kid. Just as if the bm got a raise she can have her kid benefit while she has the kid. The amount of money each parent makes should not come into play but the amount it costs should be set and this is your half and this is your half! that is my opinion anyway.

I'm glad someone else started this topic because I am at my wits end with BM!!!

DH and BM had two bio-children together. She got pregnant by another guy when they were married, which caused the divorce and has since had 3 children with three different guys bringing the total to 5. After she had her 4th child her and her fiance made the decision that it was best she quit her job to be a "stay at home mom". She still lives with the father of her last child but wont marry him because then she will lose her assistance. She has all the kids on every welfare benefit she can get her hands on even ours who she only has in her care 40% of the time.

DH and I have 60% custody of his two kids plus pay 50% of all medical, extracurricular, school related expenses, etc. You would think that would be enough but HELL NO she has taken us back to court to try and have us ordered to pay $500.00 a month in child support and 100% of medical care all because she has CHOSEN not to work!

I understand why the child support regulations are in place by WHEN do these deadbeats have to start contributing to the financial upbringing of their children?!?

How can 200 a week NOT be enough for A CHILD when my DH, my son and I have had to live off less than 500 a week and that has to pay a mortgage, cars, etc...that are needed REGARDLESS of wether you have kids or not...the incremental cost for my son and I are MINIMAL...unless of course, you think every kid DESERVES an iPod and going to the movies every week.

I hear you all.
This has been a discussion with us the last couple weeks as courts coming up.

What frustrates us is that my BF can work lots of over time and make awesome money, but of course the tax man gets his cut. But WHY should she beinifit for him working overtime to better our life. It's not right, can't win for trying. Being that I'm the one that will never see my BF cause he's wokring his ass off to provide more for us. I work full time and am paid well as well. we just want to do things in life and such. She's a money hungry wench, she thinks everything should be handed to her. If you can't support your lifestyle, get a 2nd job on your weekends with out daughter. Cause he will definitly not be!!!

My BM collects from BF, from death bennies, from another BF for another child. One day she an email telling BF that she can barely make ends meet...she gets 73K, tax free, no mortgage, no car payments and doesn't work. I had him email back to her saying...

Your probably feeling a short fall of 20k because that's what the Judge quoted you on your earning capacity to help support your children. But not working is your choice not mine.

I think BM's feel an entitlement to their ex Hubby's money because they are the MOTHER of the HEIRS to the THRONE...LOL

One time BM texted my BF that she should not have to pay for 1/2 of SD's volleyball costs. It amounted to about 250.00 with the sign up cost and shoes knee pads etc. so her share was 125.00. BF was a little hesitant to have SD join because she is all gung ho in the beginning then she fizzles out and wants to quit. So he discussed it with BM that is was alot of money to shell out if she was going to let SD quit. Well BM rants and raves that SD should be able to do what ever Extra curriculars she wants and blah blah blah. So he says fine well your share is 125.00 She says "you need to pay that all it's not fair to me" :? Her reasoning was that we had two incomes in our household. My income and BF's income and she only had one. WTF?? She had her BF living with her who just got out of prison with no job, she had no job and was living off CS that BF paid because he had a JOB!!!

Not all BMs are like this, you know. My SD17's "perfect" bio-daddy has **never** paid what he is supposed to pay for child support (under-reports his income, doesn't report income from side jobs, etc.). He also **never** contributes one extra penny for SD17's activities. For instance, she has a band trip to New York City for Thanksgiving, which is very expensive, and "perfect" bio-daddy refusues to contribute to the trip. These are just a couple examples among many.

Since my DW has a very conflict-avoidance personality, so she never challenges SD17's "perfect" bio-daddy on these issues. She has never asked for more CS, and never bothers asking for extra expenses like the band trip (SD17 asked him, and he said no). I can appreciate the fact that many posters on here are annoyed by greedy BMs, but they aren't all like that.

I've found it takes a very spiteful woman to apply for support when already recieving help from the father or if the child lives with the father half the week anyways.
When my H filed for a custody agreement, because at the time BM was talking about moving out of state with her fiancee, BM immediately filed a support case against him. His whole family, who are pretty friendly with BM got on her about how filing for support is something you do for dead beat dads. She keeps saying now that shes going to take him off, but never does.
Once support was granted, about the same as what my H had been giving her before, she stopped working. In addition to that, she lives rent free in her ex-fiancees grandmothers house and drives one of their cars. Oh, and goes out every single weekend because we're the babysitters.

AMEN! I read an article somewhere where research has been done and it has been decided that it takes roughly... $200,000 to raise a child from 0-18 years of age, depending on the part of the country you live in, etc. Now... my husband pays about $700/month plus medical insurance for his 6 yo daughter. That totals up to be about $151,000 for the 18 years... not to mention all the food that we still have to feed her when we have her, plus clothes, plus school field trips her mom won't pay for, etc.

Okay... so her mom does NOT work. Sound familiar? So according to our child support situation, my husband is responsible for over $150k of the $200k it takes to raise this kid. Here's my question... if it takes 2 to make a baby, then why isn't the cost of raising that baby split more evenly????? Why is it that the person who lied about birth control and got herself knocked up... gets a tax free $700+ a month? Why does the "system" reward these women? Meanwhile, I had nothing to do with getting this B*tch pregnant yet I spend all my time driving this kid around, showing her how to match her clothes, buying her clothes, buying her and teaching her how to eat healthy, etc. etc. and helping financially all the way around while her mom parties. WTF????