Crazy texts from BM- how to handle

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I'm a full time stepmom to SD, the HCBM 'officially' has eowe visits, but actually only sees SD once or twice for a short time on those visits as SD stays at her grandparents d/t BMs lack of stability. Weeks pass without even a phone call. She pays zero CS, does not contribute to the child's life at all. Seems to put more effort into pathetic attempts to get attention from my DH than to connect with her kid. Which brings me to the text issue. CO specifies all communication to be only via text or email. (Great because it's easy to document everything). Not great, because this psycho is high conflict and tries her darndest to turn every single thing into a back and forth text war where she spews hate and BS for literal HOURS- DH's phone blows up.
Our lawyer advised to do grey rock and ignore the BS, only respond when necessary to facts about kid, etc. Which DH has done. He's totally changed the way he deals with her crap, no longer engages and feeds her need for attention. As a result, her latest favorite thing is to target me! Because he no longer gets mad and insults her back, but responds in a businesslike manner using logic and facts, she insists on texting back as if she's talking to me. "I know this isn't you (DH) this is your wife isn't it!" And proceeds to spew bs to and about me via text. Even after he calmly corrects her, that no, this is me not my wife, she has no desire to communicate with you...she'll go "haha okay (my name) you can shut up now!" It's so flipping ridiculous and clearly shows the mental state of this egg donor. I know it's best to just let her rant and not engage, but I just can't deal today. Sometimes it's so tempting to respond in kind and tell that POS exactly what I think of her deadbeat behind.

You do not negotiate with terrorists

Its probably time to cut her off, and go through one of those online email and schedule tool. DH needs to tell her straight up, that she will no longer be able to contact him in this manner, all scheduling is to be carried through xyz application. She needs to be blocked on all fronts because all that poison is getting to you.

I have a high conflict BM, Toxic Troll, and in the beginning she was pretty bad with the texting. its been better now, Ive had to ask DH to create and enforce multiple boundaries.

It is up to DH to create and enforce boundaries. He is continuing to allow her to contact him and throw mud at him. He needs to cut her off at the knees.

I'd move to email only for

I'd move to email only for him. And block for you.

Even tho you want to tell her off don't, she will love that because she will think she got to you. Hold steady like you don't care about anything she says. I wouldn't even say or have DH say "she's blocking you" Id just do it.

DH saying "it's me not my wife" is still feeding the troll. Only respond to kid coparenting necessities.

IGNORE. Put the phone on

IGNORE. Put the phone on silent and put it in the other room. There is no "emergency" he will need to respond to from her when he has the kid with him. She's just trying a new tactic to get him to respond, which means his grey rock method is WORKING. If she gets no response, over time, she will give up

It really does work, but it gets worse before it gets better, as you are seeing. And next time there is court, ask for Our Family Wizard.