DH got served
Dh got served with papers today! BM strikes again!
BM and DH have 50/50 custody and now she has filed for a petition to modify th ecourt order.
Back in April DH and his oldest stepson got into an argument about his gradess(failing) and DH took him in the back room to talk. Stepson(17 years old now) called DH the N word and also pushed DH. DH was pissed and told the boys to call their mom and tell her to come get them because he was pissed and just basically done with them. He was upset.
Anyhow BM violated the order by not letting the boys come for their week(the agreement states every other week). The boys have not spent the night here since April.
DH has been out of work(disablility) for a year. He just went back two weeks ago(been working same job for 30 years)
Today he got served.. BM wants "sole custody"! She stated that DH punched his son repeatedly for no reason in a drunken rampage! :O Funny how she omitted the n word and it looks as if DH just got drunk and decided to beat his son! Right!
The court date is the day before Thanksgiving! DH said F* it she wants them she can have them. I'm not going! She wants child support NOW! She can have it!
He is soooo hurt about the lies! This paper has him looking like Joe Jackson who beat Michael all of his life!
Keep in mind we did the court thing last year and BM was awarded no child support! She was pissed! And now a year later she wants to file for sole custody. Why?? Because she can't afford to pay her rent and keep the boys full time.
Funny how she waited for him to "go back" to work to file for a modification.
Why is it when a father wants to be a DAD the BM alienates the children(PAS) against them.
DH has always been there for his boys(their entire lives) and ever since he dropped her and married me. NOW she wants to punish him, by trying to take away his boys!
I feel bad for him. But once again "they ain't my kids"
I don't have to tell you he
I don't have to tell you he shouldn't have hit the boy. Although getting punched on the chin by my Dad (a ex-Golden Gloves boxer) did the trick for me. Unfortunately its different when the kid has a sympathetic parent to turn towards who is anxious to seek revenge.
The boy is 17. Let him go. You'll pay a bunch of attorney fees and if your husband admits to hitting the he'll lose custody anyway. I don't care what word he used. He's the adult.
Help him repair the relationship with his son as best you can. You already know to keep out of it - good for you. As the boy matures he'll come to appreciate Dad more. I know its difficult to see a boy go astray but you can't stop him.
HE never HIT the kid!! It's
HE never HIT the kid!! It's all a lie!
"And this too shall pass..."
Good grief, is this BM ever
Good grief, is this BM ever going to stop? Seriously, she just goes on and on and on with you guys. I think you guys are doing the right thing by letting him go. Let him go, let him learn on his own, it won't be long and he'll be thanking you both for being the parents in his life. He'll come to realize on his own that his mother wants him for the money only.
Yep you are right stepmomJen
Yep you are right stepmomJen the kid is 17 and the yourger one is 15 years old! DH has been with them since they wer eborn, but he never married BM!! she would always leave and come back. I guess she thought it was Motel 6 we will always leave the light on.
I feel terrible because DH was always a hands on Dad! Now he is like screw it they are brainwashed.
"And this too shall pass..."
At the moment DH and Bm are
At the moment DH and Bm are texting each other!! Cursing each other out etc... I ask: "Why are you playing into this BS?" DH said: "Let me handle my shit!" :O
Alrighty then!! Whatever! None of my business right? Cause once again "ain't my kids!"
"And this too shall pass..."
I would make sure your DH
I would make sure your DH goes to court, if only to defend himself against this accusations!! If he doesn't, it looks like he did do it. I would go, and wait to see if his son will sit there and lie in court, then say, that is an absolute lie.
Other than that I would let the child go, it sounds like he will age out of child support soon anyway. I have no doubt their relationship will be repaired when the son is ready to mature.
But I would be DAMNED if I would let him sit there and let it go on record that he beat this child, oh wait he is almost of legal age as an adult, when he didn't. That is SICK! of them to do to him!!! If the kid will sit there and lie, I would at least make him feel bad for it-!!!!!!!
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"What luck for rulers that men do not think."
Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)Oh, so it took BM almost 7
Oh, so it took BM almost 7 months to accuse your DH of abuse?! And is there a police report? Yeah, let's see how far that goes in court.
Sole custody...well that's another story, if the kids have been in her care for over 6 months, and has NOT been asked by BioDad to have them 50/50, then BM's in her full right to ask for a modification. If BioDad wants her to have the kids then the modification is a moot point.
Now if he has wanted the boys and still does it could be tricky. Has DH asked BM to adhere to the original custody agreement?--This is crucial. If he has asked and she has refused there must be documentation of this from your end. This will go against BM and will be charged with contempt of court and "frustration-of-access". Bad, bad, bad for the BM. She's not putting the needs of her children into account. Stuff BM's thankgiving turkey with that. Ha!
BM had tem for 6 months
BM had tem for 6 months because she violated the order. DH had them for four months straight while she found another place to live(eviction). Even though she was suppose to have them every other week, but since she had no where to live...DH kept them all that time til she found something. Then when she did and after the blowout DH said "You keep them for the next 17 weeks like I did. So after the months were up she decided to brainwash and scare the boys about going over to their fathers. She drives them to school and picks them because she lives out of the district.
Yes the kids have been in her care for over 6 months,abut by BioDad wanted to have them 50/50 gain, but she refused. I told him she was in contempt of the court order annd we should go for modifiaction or at least file comtempt charges. But again DH said "Let me handle this!" Anyway, DH at the time wanted the boys but after reading yesterdays summons he has washed his hands. Or at least he says...
"And this too shall pass..."
Well hopefully he will
Well hopefully he will change his mind and go to court. Just so to clear his name. Before we went to bed he wanted me to Google "How to disown your children" :O
"And this too shall pass..."
Your DH is angry and hurt
Your DH is angry and hurt right now; not forgetting to mention his ego is bruised as well. If he had listened to you and filed a contempt charge he could have prevented being served. He has a lot of crow to eat.
Giving time, DH will calm down and probably change his mind about disowning his kids.
Yep Crayon you said it!! I
Yep Crayon you said it!!
I was trying to see if DH would change his mind about NOT going to courrt and he is still refusing!
Last night he dumped the boys' room. Threw everything from their closet, drawers, floors, under the bed etc into industrial garbage bags.
We now have ten garbage bags of their stuff sitting in the middle of the living room. He said he will put it out tonight with the trash for pickup in th morning! :O
These kids have not been in there room since April so I guess he figured they don't need any of that stuff! Oh well..
What is my saying? Oh yeah I rmember! "Not my kids!
"And this too shall pass..."