Pre-heated... yes I have and still sometimes do feel jealous. That's absolutely normal. What happens next though is up to you and if you can handle it.

It's normal because we can't help how we feel. But having said that, it's not really fair to take it out on, or demonize, or shun the little one. You have to recognize what's inside of you that is not being taken care of. You mention she is blonde / blue eyed and your features are dark. Is that it? From way back when?

Believe me girl.. it's HARD. I have had to do it myself and it is not always what I want to see about myself. But understand.. your jealousy has less to do with that 6 year old kid than something inside of you that's not getting what you want.

By the way, you may come to a conclusion that's not necessarily bad, and may save you, BF and SD from heartache in the future. Meaning, you may come to realize that what you are jealous of is having alone time with your BF, or not sharing him right now, or wanting your child to be your SO's first.. etc. Those are NOT bad things to admit to yourself and could get you out of a situation that may not be right for any of you right now.

Yes I have had my moments.
I get on with my ss very well, we both love each other and so on so forth
however in the beginning and even sometimes on occasions now i had/ have a tad of jealousy
In the beginining i felt like a stranger in my own home when ss visited and it made me feel jealous that I wasn't a part of that family and they were.
I also still have pangs of jealousy over the fact our first child wont he his, and I feel because of this my child may not be as important. Stupid I know but when he says stuff like 'your my favourite little boy' etc etc I sometimes wonder if this will stick should we have children and my child/ children will feel differently.
I think its normal, the nuclear family of 2.4 kids and mummy and daddy becomes void when you get involved with someone who already has kids, I think its worse when you dont have kids of your own as you feel like an outsider sometimes because you haven't experienced that form of love. I know I love SS but I dont know if its the same as a mother child love because I have never experienced it, and for that I'm mildly jealous of that bond.

It is a normal feeling to feel jealous...I have and still do sometimes. Especially when you know that your relationship and his relationship with his daughter are on the same level and your relationship is not the priority. Don't beat yourself up over but do try to understand that it isn't the girl who is causing it it is your BF.

P.S now that I have a bond with SS I actually get quite jealous over the fact daddy (dp) mummy (bm)and other daddy (bm's ex) all have titles, yet I do a hell of a lot for SS and I don't even get refered to as his step-mother. I dont actually want him to call me mummy like he does call bm's ex daddy I think thats wrong and he will always call me *my name* when talking at me because thats the way i want it. But no one refers to me as his step-mum... apart from bm actually on occasions and I get very little recognition for the amount I do even tho Im just as much as a parent to ss as the rest of them, if not a bit more sometimes as i often arrange things my dp wouldnt think twice about. When people ask me about my family I always say I have a step-son yet I can put money on the fact it is never mentioned that my ss has a step-mum which sometimes makes me feel the 'what about meeeeee' bit someone else in this thread has mentioned. But I accepted a long time ago no matter how much I do, no matter how much of a parent and no matter how much I care for that kid I will always be a bit void. But I accept that, and just hope some of my love rubs off of him and has a good effect on him, even if its only a little one, to me there is enough reward in his greatfulness sometimes for doing something for him.