DO YOU EVER JUST GET TIRED OF IT ALL?
Does anyone ever just get tired of it all? Dealing with the ex's and the skids. I just feel like I am starting wear down from it all and it is really starting to take a toll on my marriage. My husband and I get along wonderfully and I love him like crazy but he has a hard time dealing with my feelings about all this. I just really think that I should just sit back, keep my mouth shut and let him deal with it all. I don't even want to know unless something happens that affects my life or my money. I just get so tired of dealing with it all the time. I pretty much told him why don't you just do what you think is best and leave me out of it. You deal with your ex's and kids and I will deal with mine and if we want each others opinions we can ask. Of course this is easier for me my children are all adults (29, 28, 20, 19)and so very rarely do I have to deal with mine but his are (23-lives with us, 21, 18-doesn't speak to us, 13-mom has total control over him and uses it and 5-same thing) My ex's are somewhat normal his are a constant pain in the you know what. One has us in court for more CS as we speak and the other had us there last year. They are just a constant interference in our lives and have just put us thru hell. From horrible accusations to trying to turn the kids against us, they have done it all. I am just so worn out from dealing with it and when I speak my opinion it can sometimes cause problems between hubby and myself. So do I just swallow it and live my own life as much as possible? DH doesn't like the idea of me not being totally involved, he feels it leads to living separate lives. But I really wonder how much more I can take.
I'm SO tired of it
and it's hard to sit back and just let him deal with it and let his bratty son be a snot, but I feel like I can't sit back because MY daughter is also involved in the situation so I have to think of her also. I speak my opinion most of the time because the guy is so inconsistant it drives me nuts. But on the other hand, BM is physically neglecting FSS, and there's not a thing we can do...he came here this weekend just reeking, than told us he hadn't had a bath in a couple days...that's just outright disgusting...
Sick of DH "not thinking"
As if dealing with behavior issues from all kids isn't bad enough, the most frustrating is dealing with a DH that just doesn't think ahead. It really doesn't matter what the issue of the moment is, I feel I have to teach my DH how to think for the future. Example: SS is supposed to be taking lunch to school instead of purchasing at lunch line(same as my Bkids), he doesn't, instead gets free lunch from school, DH forgets about it, creating different set of rules for all kids in the home which in turn creates issues at home on 1 rule for everyone. Then I have to blow up and be the mean bit** about it. Had DH just nipped the school lunch thing in bud from the beginning, we would not have some of the "fairness" issues and I would not be angry. Example 2: The company DH works for just changed insurance companies, so life ins. papers needed to be filled out. Of course, he filled me in as primary, but then put his 15yr old estranged daughter as secondary, I caught this before he sent it in and had asked him change this to his parents. I said "She is not responsible enough to take care of finances if something happened to both of us, it would be party central for her." His response was "Oh , you're right, I wasn't thinking",then he changed it to his parents. It is just so hard to think ahead for every scenario that comes up and loving a DH who lives like a deer caught in the headlights instead of putting actual plans into place. Although, Dh is sooo much better about thinking ahead than he used to be. Someone on this site had a qoute from Roseanne, Good men don't just happen, they are created by us women. Amen!!! No offense to the great guys on this site and no offense meant to my DH, he is a great man, just very misguided sometimes.