I have a coworker I am looking for advice for the situation she finds herself in. She and her XH divorced over 6 years ago because she caught him cheating. They have three kids together (D18, D14 and S11). I have told her before that she is the BM that I WISHED we could have had. She has tried to keep her XH very informed on their lives and activities. She also sends him copies of their report cards and splits school crafts between them. She also voluntarily choose to give 50/50 custody even after he took time off from his job to get his CS lowered because of a falsely decreased income AND even though he barely takes the kids ONCE a week instead of half the time!

The two younger kids have ADHD and the younger girl is autistic. The XH has been told, even by a therapist, that he should bring any new romantic interests in slowly because of the girl's problems with change. That has resulted in him marrying a girl he only knew for two weeks and moving in someone he met on the internet after two months (along with HER kids that she uprooted from where they lived!). This was after the previous GF moved out and he got charged with domestic assault.

The kids decided that they didn't want to go to their dad's anymore after this new fling moved in. The XH and Fling promised the girl a new cell phone if she came over. She did. A few weeks later, Fling is calling D14 in the middle of the night saying that her dad is drunk and beating her and is threatening to kick her and her kids out of his house. (WTF does she expect a 14 year old to do????)

Well, over the past weekend, S11 got into a fight with a friend who was over and it turned physical. Coworker and her fiance grabbed the kids to break it up and snap them into reality. S11 had red marks on his arm from the fight. D14 snapped a picture and sent it to her dad saying that mom's fiance did this to S11. XH called the cops. D14 was telling the neighbor that her mom was going to lose her job now and the fiance would go to jail.

My coworker's fiance has now also broken up with her. He says that he loves her but cannot live in a situation where he has to walk on eggshells because anything he says or does will be reported to her XH who wants to get him in trouble always. This is not the first time the XH has tried to get him in trouble. Too bad that it is in the interests of lowering his CS rather than whether or not his children are in danger!

I am hopeful that the charges will all be dropped (especially if D14 admits that she wasn't even around when the incident occurred) but what the hell can a person do against someone like that who is determined to ruin another person's life? And bribing your own children to try to get you in trouble?!?