I can only say 1 good thing about both SK's (8 and 14). They get good grades in school. But honestly I don't know how I have seen the work they have turned in and the brain gean comes from BM not very smart.

Just glad I'm not alone. On a positive note at least it sounds like your husband is supportive of you.

I am one of the "lucky" ones, I guess. My skids are pretty dang good - as is my own DS20.

BM is crazy as a loon but at least I only have one to deal with for the 2 skids.

SS - GREAT sense of humor, very organized and keeps his room clean (except the towel he forgets in there), loves to come visit and will get in fights with BM to allow it, he has a good head on his shoulders and realizes that his dad is getting the shaft.

SD - I'd have more good things to say about her if I got to SEE her or hear from her. I believe that she is either being PASed or manipulated in some way by BM as BM realized quickly that grandbaby is ANOTHER way she can screw over H...as well as an additional source of CS for her non-working ass.

I can say that she is very pretty and mostly smart (at least til her hormones took over) and she chose the harder choice (to keep the baby) because she could have easily got an abortion (BM wanted her to) or give up for adoption.

Unfortunately, her teenage hormones and mistaken belief that her and baby daddy would be in love forEVER, has really messed with her future. She was supposed to be training for the Olympics and going on a class trip to Paris. Guess not...

God, I tried for two years and gave up lately.*********

Does she acknowledge me when I am around: NEVER

Does she talk to me nice or say thank you ever: NOT ONCE

Does she pick up after herself (after I ask): NEVER

Does she talk to me or just address dad when I am standing right next to him: OH YES DAD ONLY

Does she tell people she hates me: IDK

SD (Bitchula) doesn't live in the same city I do.
Refuses to talk to me.
Refuses to acknowledge my existence.
Is so blatant about her dislike of me that even DH clued in.

These are good things ....right? hahahahahahaha

I can say plenty of nice things about my sd. but still is still young, so I worry sometimes that when she gets to be a teenager that I will change my tune! and being raised over 50% of the time by BM, I wonder...

Pleasant things about my SS-18.

He is an incredible polite young man.
He cares about people.
He is well behaved and has been little real trouble for his mom and I.
He is a pleasure to spend time with if you don’t have to live with him.
He is an intelligent conversationalist ... when he actually talks.
He has never played the "your not my dad" card with me.

Other than his 5-7yr maturity deficit, his lack of focus and refusal to perform to his ability, his extreme laziness, his pre visitation behavioral issues and post visitation detox from exposure to the toxic toothless SpermClan I have no complaints about my son.

Does she acknowledge me when I am around......Yep
Does she talk to me nice or say thank you ever.........Yep
Does she pick up after herself (after I ask).......Not without a battle
Does she talk to me or just address mom when I am standing right next to him.. He talks to me.
Does he tell people she hates me........IDK but I highly doubt it. Hmmmmm? On second thought.

As far as custodial StepDad adventures go, mine has not been too bad.

Best regards,

Does she acknowledge me when I am around? sometimes
Does she talk to me nice or say thank you ever? that depends on her mood.it's hit or miss.
Does she pick up after herself? no way.that's what daddy is for.
Does she talk to me or just address dad when I am standing right next to him? She starts all sentences and thoughts with Dad.
Does she tell people she hates me? yup.all the time.

I can think of nothing nice to say about sd anymore.oh wait except...hmmm nope.nothing.

I can honestly say I can..

They all get good grades..

They all do pick up after themselves even when I tell them too. (most of the time they mind me better than my own kids)

They all talk to me and say please and thank you (when they are prompted but hey most kids have to be)

They will take up for me and have told me that they really like me and I am a good mom.

They have a crazy woman for a mom and they have all said so, I really think that with mine and dh's relationship that it showed them what a healthy and good marriage is supposed to be like. And what reality is really like as we do not live in a world of our own like bm does.

Ooooohhhh...it's a struggle!

SS26 shows all the signs of being bi-polar. Other than the fact you never really know which one of him will show up, he does have a heart of gold. Now, if he could just get a real job, decent friends, and "get a plan" we'd be good!

SD24--nope....got nothing.....

Pluses, SD36:

We are very lucky she has kept a job so far and for the last 14 years has managed to keep employed.
She keeps up personal hygeine.

Minuses, SD36:

Does she acknowledge me when I am aroung......Nope
Does she talk to me nice or say thank you ever.........Nope
Does she pick up after herself (after I ask)........Nope
Does she acknowledge my existence? Mostly no
Does she tell people she hates me........Yes - It's more than obvious.
Does she or her hubby ever pay for anything? No
Does she send Daddy Father's Day or Birthday cards? NO
Does she ever acknowlege my Birthday even when she is present for it? HELL NO!
Does she play immature, sadistic games? All of the time
Does she manipulate Daddy to side with her against me? Definitely!

The good thing now though is that the 'Princess' will not be 'gracing' this house again. YEAH!

After reading some responses - I am counting my blessings!!
Does she acknowledge me when I am around .........yes
Does she talk to me nice or say thank you ever.........Most of the time
Does she pick up after herself (after I ask)........Yes (she's neat but not clean)
Does she talk to me or just address dad when I am standing right next to him....talks fine to me & her dad
Does she tell people she hates me........She lies about what I make her do around the house, but her CRAZY BM throws a HUGE guilt trip on her if she ever says anything nice about me.

we've done this before on here and I always try and participate because I think it is good to think of positives-but trutfully I am always challenged. I am one of the ignored and disrespected and have been for years-he doesnt do well in school. He is not thoughtful or kind to others. He is not neat or clean. Usually, the best I come up with is that he is somewhat athletically inclined. He is smart, BUT he doesnt apply himself at all. He did actually speak to me on facebook a few weeks ago at his own intiation so that was a major breakthru. Other than that I got nothing.

positives about FSD 10 yrs old

Does she acknowledge me when I am around......Yes
Does she talk to me nice or say thank you ever.........yes, working on making sure she says "thank you" ALL the time
Does she pick up after herself (after I ask)......yes, getting better
Does she talk to me or just address dad when I am standing right next to him........ yes, when disceplinign she used to lookat dad when i asked her to do something, but its getting better
Does he tell people she hates me........not that i know of

good points about FSD 10:
-gets very good grades
-extremely advanced in speaking, writing, reading
-pretty affectionate/lovable for a kid of divorce (although maybe its a bit of abondonment issues)
-has good self confidence (although that can go the other way to "princess syndrom")
-genuinley seems like she wants to spend time with me and takes interest in my work and hobbies (crazy i know!)
-energetic and fun (but how many kids aren't at 10)

My main complaints are that she doesn't know how to share-single child syndrome, can be a bully, mean and spoiled

Nice things...she does like to help, she is very perceptive when I'm at the end of my rope and kicks in to help me w/anything I need. She's surprised me before where we came back to her sweeping, emptying dishwasher/loading. She'll cook waffles or offer snacks to the boys. She is very sweet to my pets-my dog absolutely adores her. She is 80pct of the time respectful towards me and SEEMS to mostly like me. She is affectionate and can be totally sweet-when she wants to. She is driven with sports which I think will help keep her out of trouble.

Does she acknowledge me when I am around......Yep
Does she talk to me nice or say thank you ever.........NMostly-with some bad moment exceptions
Does she pick up after herself (after I ask).......Mostly
Does she talk to me or just address dad when I am standing right next to him.. She talks to me.
Does he tell people she hates me........ IDK either...I don't believe so.

Im a little jaded right now because we're in the middle of a fight. But I have SS18. The Bad,Is a drama king, not a hard worker looks for the easy way out. average to below average athletically and Is a bit delusional when it comes to his abilites but does try hard when motivated. big seeker of attention. takes no initiative

The Good- Good hear, caring and giving to his friends. Above average student. Polite and repectful to most. Not to me on occasion though. mmhh, outgoing socially, patriotic.

Does she acknowledge me when I am aroung......sometimes
Does she talk to me nice or say thank you ever.........sometimes
Does she pick up after herself (after I ask)........when asked too
Does she talk to me or just address dad when I am standing right next to him.. yes he does address me if he knows it will be a positive response..if he has doubts he goes to his mother
Does she tell people she hates me.......Im sure at times

Personality wise not sure If Id want to be his friend..is that bad to say? also have doubts that I really like him. Is that also bad to say? Arent we suppose to like/love our Skids?

Nice things to say about SD14, she is beautiful, if very very vain about it, gets good results in school and tries very hard with her home work.

I am respected - ha doubtful
Does she hate me? - 100%
Is she polite to me -80% of the time to my face - when everything is going her way e.g when she can sit on her arse and not lift a finger, when asked to do something she doesn't want to the beasts of hell are unleashed.
Does she live a peaceful and tranquil life - god no only happy when she is causing trouble with all her family not just me.
And I have recently found out that she is lying about the way I treat her ha, running telling tales to grandparents who then phone my hubby to say do you know what you wife has done to my grand daughter, blah blah blah.

I have completely disengaged to save my sanity although still accused of being the biggest and most evil bitch on the planet, its a no win situation so don't try- god i should have listened to my mother when she warned me at 18 not to get involved with a man who has kids. ah young love!!

Yes, there is one thing I LOVE about my skids....they won't/can't come over to our house very often so I rarely EVER have to see them anymore.

We still send a big fat check to BM, but hey, as long as she doesn't call us whining about ss17, I don't give a F about it.

DH wishes it were different. That the whole mess didn't drive me over the cuckoo nest...but well, it did. I just try to remain stress free and live my happy, peaceful life.

SD21 works at Walmart - love it, lives with her BF
SS20 works at Sam's Club - love it, lives with BM
SS17 lives w/BM - does nothing at all. love it, he drives her crazier!!

Not sure what to say. I'm really trying to think of something positive about SS11. SS11 has almost zero personality, is poor at sports, music and anything else extra-curricular, he loses everything, blames everyone else for anything that happens, and is a bully. He comes with his hand out and leaves the other kids in our home crying. BM has PAS'd him so bad in the last few years. He used to be a sweet boy toward DH and I (never to other kids, even at school). Too bad things have changed and he has become a carbon copy of BM. The only thing positive I can really think of right now is he is good at video games-not sure how positive that is though.

Does he acknowledge me when I am around .........only when he wants something
Does he talk to me nice or say thank you ever........again, only when he wants something and almost NEVER says thank you for anything even after ALL the other kids have said thank you it seems it is impossible for him to follow suit
Does he pick up after himself (after I ask)........No. I always have to get DH to enforce whatever I've said
Does he talk to me or just address dad when I am standing right next to him.....he has no problems talking to me about what he wants. Thanks to his BM's PASing him he's scared to discuss anything more than the weather with us (gotta love when a BM tells her kid that if he tells us anything about her house we are going to go to a judge to make it where he never sees his BM again. Good way to alienate the kids from his father and his family).
Does he tell people he hates me.......Not that he hates me, but he sure as hell makes up lies about me to his BM because SS11 says it makes his BM happy to hear bad things about me and our family.