Husband Took It Out On The Dog Instead of Me

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Last night my 4 month old Chihuahua had an accident on the floor while he was out playing in the living room. I went into the bathroom for a moment and My DH and Step son were sitting within 2 feet of the dog when he had the accident. My step son said, " Hurry up and get her before she touches it!" (He was referring to our 2 year old daughter). I ran out of the room, and my husband was still sitting there along with my Step Son. I grabbed a paper towel and my husband took our daughter to wash her hands just in case. After picking up his accident, I put him in his kennel and my husband was washing her hands. All of a sudden he began yelling that "Its under her nails!" So apparently while they were all sitting there somehow they "missed it" when she touched the dog mess. I was upset for my daughter ...not at her...for her. However, thank heavens she didn't put it in her mouth. Anyways, my husband stopped cleaning her hands, went over to the kennel, picked up the kennel, opened the door and threw the dog (inside the kennel) down the stairs. The kennel hit the front door and then the floor. The dog yelped, but luckily was ok.

I was furious with him for what he had just done and told him that his reaction wasn't called for. I washed our daughters hands, clipped her nails and gave her a bath. PROBLEM SOLVED! What did throwing the dog down the stairs prove or solve? It didn't reverse what had happenned...it just showed that he has anger issues.

My husband blamed me for even having a dog in the first place. He said had I never got the dog, had he not pooped, etc...he laughed it off, thought it was funny and so did his son.

I told him he needs to get it together and find a new place to live. I feel like he took out his anger FOR me out on the DOG. Does anyone else think this? I've heard that men who do this wont stop at the dog and will eventually do it to me. Does anyone NOT think this to be true? Does anyone think that he took it out on the dog because he KNOWS he can't get away with doing it to me? I feel like Im to blame for even allowing the dog out in the first place.

No..I dont know anyone by

No..I dont know anyone by that name? He SAYS he would go to counciling, but he's never been one do what he says he'll do. When he starts stuff he doesnt see it through...he makes excuses for pretty much everything and makes it sound good - to the person on the outside looking in, they will give him credit when in fact they dont realize hes feeding them a bunch of crap

Um, that is sick and I hope

Um, that is sick and I hope he gets to come back as a dog in some future life, if that is possible!!

I agree that anyone who can treat a defenseless animal like this, who is in her cage minding her own business, after she accidentally had a normal body function in an imperfect manner, is not rational and should not be around children or animals, much less you!!!!!

If I saw him do this I swear to God I would call the cops on him!!!

No, I dont know who Crew

No, I dont know who Crew is...my DH has shown violence before, not with punching or hitting, but shoving, mushing hot pizza in my face, etc...a last week he was stabbing the wall - not sure what made him so mad, but he came home that way. A few months before that he was mad at soemthing else trivial and he flipped our bed over in anger - again not sure why he was so incredibly angry.

And you're still with

And you're still with him...why?

He doesn't need to be near

He doesn't need to be near anywhere animals...EVER!

I have no idea about what your past history is because you have no blogs...having this be the first thing that I've read from you (that I can recall), I don't like your DH, AT ALL! What he did is cruelty to animals...over a puppy accident no less!

Some people have no problem beating up defenseless animals and never moving on to humans. But if that were my DH, it would be over...not because I feared for myself or my children but because I could NEVER be with someone who treated animals that way...much less a freaking PUPPY!

Im just looking for some

Im just looking for some support because I know he will try to use guilt and manipulation to try and stick around. I dont have any family around and I came here for support and re-enforcemnt - not to be accused of anything or judged.

I want to make a good and wise decision and not be accused of being someone named CREW...for the last time I dont know who the hell CREW is. If you're not here to be kind and helpful then you must be here to be rotten and nasty for your own personal pleasure; and in that case YOU might need help.

Well, I have posted around

Well, I have posted around here before about my DH and issues with his ex and being a Step parent...jsut not under General Discussion....I didn't think it would spark people to be suspicious of me. Wow, I guess I better reconsider what I post.

Thank you for the "Im Sorry"

Thank you for the "Im Sorry" I appreciate it...not many people say that these days.

Thank you

Luckily I live where I work.

Luckily I live where I work. Im the site manager for a property and I live herre as part of the job. So, hes the one who needs to go...and he can take his son with him.

Although I wanted to keep the

Although I wanted to keep the dog, I felt it was in his best interest and safety to find him a different home without the anger issues. I think it would have been selfish of me to keep him, and then be in fear of letting him out of his kennel -which wouldnt have been fair to him.

I agree that the timeline is

I agree that the timeline is getting muddy.
I will treat this as an honest post for support. First thing is to not be sidetracked by his manipulation. He needs help and you cannot save him.
At the very most a 4 month old chihuahua is 2-3lbs. If you don't care about your own safety then think of small animals/children. What happens when he gets pissed bc your child spilled juice? If his son thought it was funny then you should also worry what he's capable of.
I think the only support you'll find is to pack and get out. If my spouse/SO/DH came home and started stabbing the wall I'd be out of there before you could say PSYCHO. If he even thought of laying a hand on my dog I'd use the knife on him.

I agree..the amount of people

I agree..the amount of people who seem to be angry with me because of his actions are amazing. why is that? Maybe I should look at myself. Finding the dog a home quickly for his safety I figured was a good idea..because had I not and he came home tonight and actually injured him or killed him then everyone would have been upset with me and blaming me for NOT taking some kind of action.

I think taking quick and swift action to make sure the puppy was safe was the best thing to do. Now, I can focus on regrouping and getting control of my home by getting him out. Why is anyone questioning my timeline? Like I said...if I took no action Id be getting the same crap or worse. you know what. I picked the wrong place to even talk about this. Some of you in here must really have had some bad experiences with other members for you to assume so quickly that someone is trying to be misleading. Sorry, but I don't have the time for lying and playing games.

But honey, it's not about the

But honey, it's not about the dog! It's about you and your child. He has shoved hot pizza in your face??? I'm not questioning your timeline. I had the same thing happen to me. My ex saw the cat pee on the floor, threw her down the stairs, put her in the shower and nearly drowned her and then threw her in the cabinet in the bathroom.
When I got home, he and his buddy were laughing about it and drinking. I did the same as you and rushed my poor cat to my best friends for safe keeping. That was the first bell that went off. He'd hit me, he'd driven my face into the carpet with his knee, he'd done a lot of things but I don't think it hit home until he started abusing my animals. Thank God I had supportive family and when I said I wanted out they got me out.
Please kick them out or leave. This will not get better. Please. And if you want to PM me, please to so- I know how hard this is.

Thank you to those who have

Thank you to those who have taken the time to see that I'm legit and not bs'ing anyone. I didnt "DUMP THE DOG" - thank you. I think it's really unecessary to word things in such a way to make it appear as if I didn't want the dog becasue of my husband. As I said before, I felt that I needed to act quickly. I think you're assuming I picked the husband over the dog? That was not my intent.

I see this as a step by step process. Firstly, since the dog was the victim here, make sure he is safe and sound. It wouldn't have been fair to keep him just to say "I kept him" just so he could be injured or killed. Next, getting him and his son out of my house and me and my daughter secured in my home is the next move..the way I see it. I feel somewhat of a responsibility to his son as well (regarding them moving out) because he is a kid and he's caught in the middle of this too. So, having said that since he will be moving with his father, I am encouraging his father to get on the ball and find a place, hopefully where he can at least stay in the same school in the midst of all this nonsense -If he can't seem to take this opportunity and "behave himself" then the next move is to say that you AND YOUR SON need to go NOW.

Wow..that's

Wow..that's incrredible...that someone was so manipulative to do such a thing!!!

Well the reason why I didn't post that I had found the dog a home was because within the past hour or so his new owner came to pick him up. I brought him to work with me even though I wasn't supposed to...She was a really nice lady who absoultey adored him!!!

DMM, let me tell you, from

DMM,
let me tell you, from someone who has been there and done that, this man is an abuser. He threw a toy sized dog down the stairs because it had an accident? That is not normal. He smashed hot pizza in your faces because he was angry, that is domestic violence toward you. The man is an abuser, and you do not have the power to change him. I made excuses for my ex husband for years. "Oh, he never hit me" I used to say. No, he didn't. But he pulled me backwards by my ponytail until I hit the ground, while I was 8 months pregnant. He threw dresser drawers at me all because I asked him to help me pick up the house. He threw a cordless phone at me with such force that when it hit the wall where my head had been only moments before not only did the entire ohone shatter into dozens of pieces but it put a hole it the wall. To this day all I can think about it what if that had hit my head as he had intended. He belittled me, he demeaned me, he made me feel as if my very exsistence was worthless. And I allowed it, until I looked at my infant son and asked myself, is this how I want my son to grow up? Is this the life I want for him? That gave me the strength to walk away. Look at your daughter and asked yourself, is this what kind of man you want your daughter involved with? IF a man mashed her face into hot pizza, how would you feel? What kind of life do you want for her? Believe me, I know how hard it is, and I also know that it may take you a while to absorb how serious this is, to realize you need to protect yourself and your daughter before anything else. MY advise is this. just get the man and his son out of your house. It is sad that his son is caught in the middle, I agree. But your mindset needs to have the safety of you and your daughter as priority, since legally there is nothing you can do for the SS. You could try reporting him to child protective services if you feel your SS is in danger, but beyond that, they need to go. If you have close friends who can help you pack his things, call them. If not, pack them up, put them on the front step, and have the locks changed. This is beyond your control, this is not what love is, and you have too much worth to let a man treat you like this. If you need more support find a local battered women's shelter and talk to them, see if they have support groups. No one should have to live this way, and trust me, if I can find the strength to walk away from my abusive ex, you can find the strength to walk away from yours. My strength came from my faith in God, from my church family, from my friends, from my tiny son. Take a deep breath and do what you have to do, and never look back.

When you're caught up in the

When you're caught up in the drama it's hard at times to break away, but you owe it to your bd to get this man out.

I was in an abusive relationship and it took him breaking my nose at a gorgeous resort in Cancun to get out. I was too weak to have him arrested in Mexico, but when we got home and I needed surgery to reduce the nasal fracture I realized this wasn't a way to live.

You will get burned badly by this one day or your child might.