I kinda feel bad but I can't seem to "let this go"
My SD9 looks and acts exactly like her mother. When she smiles she is a spitting image. Pictures of her mother when she was SDs age...they look like twins, you can't tell them apart. When SD laughs she sounds just like BMs laugh. Since it's BM that I really have an issue with...I need some advice on how to get rid of my hate for SD because I despise her because I see so much of BM in her. I have been with SO for 4 years and I never hate hatred towards SD untiul the bullshit drama got real bad. I got along with BM in the beginning. SO warned me that there was going to be a lot of drama. He HATES drama and confrontation and will avoid it at all costs. BM tells SD to do and say things to try to tick me off. BM has insulted me because I don't work (I am a full time college student-days and nights) and I take care of BS14, BD9, and SD9 (she lives her full time) when I am not in school or studying. BS14 still cannot be trusted to be home alone. BM will say crap about me not working and being lazy and moochy. And she does this so I can hear it. And it's never an area where I can just leave and not be around. Yet, BM doesn't have a job, doesn't go to school, doesn't clean the house and has no children at home to take care of. It's perfectly okay for her but not for me-it's that entitlement attitude that pisses me off.
"BM will say crap about me
"BM will say crap about me not working and being lazy and moochy. And she does this so I can hear it. And it's never an area where I can just leave and not be around."
Why are you in a situation with BM where you can not leave?
You should not have to deal with BM at all.
Even if she's dropping the kids off, those drop offs should occur outside your home, in the front yard or something like that.
I don't really care what BM
I don't really care what BM says about me. I think the real issue is that I have extreme anger towards BM because she has called CPS seven times in the four years that I have been with my SO. And this last time she created horrible lies that could have affected BS14 for the rest of his life and she got SD involved in these lie by promising SD that SD would come live with her if she lied. All cases were unfounded on my side, however, she has fucked herself twice by calling CPS because there was stuff with her home that was indicated. But, because of all the false CPS calls...I think that my =anger has just spilled over and everything that she says or does gets my blood boiling. And please don't say, "leave"...I'm here for advice, not to be told to leave.
The best advice is to protect
The best advice is to protect your child. This woman can destroy your son's life.
Making sure my son is never labeled a sex offender would be more important to me than getting over my feelings for SD.