I'm New and want to say Hello and introduce myself
Hello everyone, I'm Grandma C, I'm new to your sight and very happy to have discovered it.
I'm 59 years old, mother to a grown son, and step-mother to 4. I'm very blessed with 9 beautiful healthy grandkids.
My hubby was married twice before we joined our lives. The first wife has over the years been a pain in the behind. DH has two grown daughters 38, and 41.
Wife #2 is a good person who DH has two children by a son 27 and a daughter 28.
It's been interesting to say the least with the two wifes, each being entirely different and each with different expectations and demands from DH.
My relationship with the kids has changed over the years. At the beginning I had very little contact with the two older girls from the Ex#1 as she Dh told me was difficult and made issues causeing DH to have little to no contact with the children but expecting to have the benifits and child support until the girls reached the age of 21. To date we have a very wonderful relationship with SD#1 and her hubby and 4 children who I am blessed to be loved and respected, appreciated and called Grandma by.
As for SD#1 sister who is 28, I can say very little good about her. Over the years she has been very difficult, I was with DH nearly two years before I met her, even though she only lived 10 miles away. When she was to be married (the first time) she made contact with her fater so he could help pay for the wedding. Since then she has divorced. But still comes around seeking money, favors, etc. She has a daughter 4 years old from a baby daddy who is 11 years her junior. We see very little of her also unless we do favors, give money or what not.
Wife #2 two children are good kids and have offered little problems as adults.
I hope to find insight and ideas about how others deal with adult Children in step families.
Thanks for listening!!!
I made a typo error when
I made a typo error when referring to the SD....the one I speaking about was the 38 years old, not the 28 year old.
We do however have contact with their mothers and our paths cross at school events etc for the grandkids and other activities such as birthdays, Christmas, weddings, baby showers etc.
When I was speaking of the....."each with different expectations and demands from DH'...I was reffering to the time DH was paying child support for the 4 children and we were at the time raising the children and seeing the 4 of them through school, high school, and college. During that period there were many demands and expectations we experienced during those years.
As of now things have evolved to a different level with other issues.
Yes, I do agree when our children reach the agees of 27, 28, 38 and 41 they are adults.
As for the 38 year old, (my typo mistake before as 28) she is a very difficult individual as is her mother. I feel badly we don't have the same relationship with her daughter, our granddaughter, as we do the other grandkids. I for one am not an advocate of the attitute of entitlement, meaning just because somebody is a "Blue eyed blondie" she should have the whole world placed at her feet just because she is DH daughter. It's very sad and the one who sufferes in the long run is the poor innocent granddaughter who has no clue why things are the way they are.
Good morning and welcome.
Good morning and welcome. For two years I thought the problems I had with being a stepmom were just me but this site has helped me so much with how to deal with BM, DH and the SS's.
Thanks for your welcome It's
Thanks for your welcome
It's great to be here <3
I agree with you there, life
I agree with you there, life is too short to waste time on nasty people.
My life has taught me there is no point in trying to convince somebody to love me, also long ago I learned you can't save people from themselves. Some people are just determined to self distruct no matter how hard or long you to try to stop them from going over the cliff.
Sometimes they drag you over the cliff with then...sad fact that is often learned too little too late.