Need Help Im New Here :)
Hello everyone,
Okay I'm almost 30, and no I'm not a stepmother.. just the new partner. Its complicated because I have known this family for a few years now.. and we my partner and I we're Friends with Benefits for a lot of that time.. but now we have officially got together recently. I'm just trying to deal with the day to day things like tonight they took their child to the doctors.. it makes me feel why am I even there.
He is the best dad he can be, and he has pretty much full time of their son.. she would rather be having her life and being selfish.. only makes time for him when she wants.
She wants my partner back and to be a family.. and she is playing her games, by telling me things such as that he went over for sex etc which I don't believe. She is a liar and manipulative.
I know I have to be the supportive girlfriend.. just hurts when they have to do family stuff eg appointments, and god don't start me with when he is older.. it'll just get worse. He is only 3yrs old so the fun has just begun.
Sorry for the vent.. and yes im new so I get quite emotional to a few things.. I know if I want my relationship I have to have thicker skin and not let it get to me.
Can anyone plz help me. Much love xx
Also just adding that we
Also just adding that we never cheated.. my partner was just in the same house because he thought he was doing the right thing to stay for the child. The relationship between my partner and his ex was over along time ago.
And also I have no kids of my own.
Forgive me but I literally
Forgive me but I literally LOL when I read this. A friend of mine is with a woman that said the same thing about her and her husband, they were living together for the sake of the kids. My friend found out the hard way that the woman was still sleeping with her husband and he had no idea his wife was having yet another affair. The wife did finally leave her husband for my friend but that is another story. You will have a very hard time in this situation.
I'm surprisef by the number
I'm surprisef by the number of people who fall for the "I'm not having sex with my wife/husband line."
I'm sorry but since when is
I'm sorry but since when is it necessary for both parents to take the child to the doctors? Unless this was an appointment where both parents were required to give a developmental history, family history or have medical tests themselves, I don't see the necessity for them to go together.
Given that your SO is aware that his ex-wife has been lying (?) to you and trying to cause problems in your relationship, he should CATEGORICALLY cut all contact with her that is not 100% necessary for the well-being of their child. He should do this to, 1) send her a clear message that they have no future together and, 2) to make you feel more secure.
x
Maybe BM isn't lying. He may
Maybe BM isn't lying. He may be doing all this stuff with BM to keep her from telling the OP more of what may be going on.
X's with benefits .... is not
X's with benefits .... is not a foundation for a new relationship. My XW offered to hookup when I was in town after she left me for her geriatric fortune 500 executive sugar daddy. I did not take the bait. It was not worth the effort.
Instead I re-engaged in my own life and moved on to an amazing marriage, career and adventure.
I suggest that rather than even risk that your BF is still hooking up with his XW that you sit him down for a very well defined clarity session on how the interface with the XW will unfold going forward.
DH attends all skid doctors
DH attends all skid doctors appointments with BM to make sure the doctor gets all the info, and that DH gets all the info from the doc.
When he doesn't attend (for instance, while BM was living out of state temporarily), he has to go through hell and high water just get a doctor's name .. let alone any medical info. When he finally does get in touch with the doctor (usually weeks later), he realizes that the doc has prescribed medical treatment without complete background info.
For instance, skids were put on rigorous asthma and allergy medications to counteract new symptoms .. but BM never told the doc she AND her mom smoked IN THEIR HOME.
Doesn't seem to matter to the courts very much that this is all in violation of their CO.
DF picks up SDs6&8 Friday
DF picks up SDs6&8 Friday Evening for their month long visit. They are doing to day camp while he works and I enjoy my summer break.
On the weekends we'll do day trips to theme and water parks.
In August DF and I are sailing on Oasis of the Seas.