Poor kid, she probably is out of control with BM. BM sounds a bit out of control herself. The child probably misses the stability she has with you two when she is with BM. My concern would be BM saying things about you that are distressing he child.
Is it possible for your fiancé to go to one of these counselling sessions, or at least speak with her counsellor to get the gist of what's going on, and what BM is telling the counsellor. I'm surprised the counsellor hasn't ask to speak with him. Then again I guess BM wouldn't tell you if he/she had.

As far as child care etc., forget it. She cannot make you pay for that. But her accusations against you are concerning. Just stay away from her as much as possible. Let your fiancé do all the communicating with her. She sounds very jealous of you. The sound of your voice or the sight of you, especially a pregnant you, would be like a red rag to a bull. So I'd suggest you have no contact with her at all.

All the best with the pregnancy.

Depending on the state, BM can force dad to help pay for child care during her time. If she works or is in school full time, he will have to pay.

Check your state's child support site for details.

She's just jealous. When my DH and I first got together, BM freaked out. Then when we moved in together, she freaked again. When we got married, she freaked AGAIN. I can't even imagine her reaction when she finds out we are having a baby (not pregnant yet but we are trying). I just try not to let her get to me. She really is not a part of my life unless I make her a part of my life and I have no time or desire for her negativity! Try to just let it go and enjoy your pregnancy!

Well you know what. She's just an idiot. Don't let her turn you into one. Just give her enough rope, I think she's the type who will hang herself.

She can't steal your fiancé, he would have to want to go. Now unless he is a bigger idiot than she is, in which case I doubt you'd be marrying him, then why would he choose her immature selfish stupidly over a happy settled family life with you. Don't worry, the more noise she makes, the sooner she will deafen him. He will see it all, probably did when his relationship with her ended, she is just putting the icing on the cake for him now, showing him how much better he is out of that relationship with her, and how lucky he is to have and be in love with you. She's doing you a favour.

Don't ring her, call her or communicate with her in anyway. When sd repeats her mothers bs, don't bag her mother, you can say, no that's not right because, or you can say, that's not nice, I don't want you to say things like that, just keeping it about her and not, your mothers a liar, or your mother shouldn't say things like that. But please don't get to the stage where you resent the child because she was unfortunate to have a mother like this. It is not her fault. Sounds like your fiancé has chosen a mother for his children more wisely this time. So, enjoy your family and don't get infected by her madness. She can't hurt you if you don't let her.

The less attention she gets from your fiancé and yourself, the sooner this will stop. It really is up to your fiancé to make sure he doesn't get caught in that trap where they think they have to jump through hoops or BM will withhold their child. That and only that is what will cause problems I your relationship, not her. Your fiancé giving her the upper hand by being scared.

Relax, enjoy your family and your pregnancy. It really is all good for you, don't let that idiot spoil it. You can't control her, but you can control how you feel,about her. When it gets to you, just remember, she is just jealous. Hopefully she gets herself a long term boyfriend soon so you can get on with he rest of your pregnancy in peace.

Oh nuts, I was hoping a boyfriend might get her off your back. But a boyfriend and a baby, and she's still relentless. Guess she doesn't think much of her boyfriend, Let's hope Santa brings her a better one.

Glad your going to stay away from her, just do it mind, body and soul. She is nothing to you. Let her say what she wants, j she's a nutter, an unhappy jealous one at that, you have all the happiness in the world. Don't ruin it by giving her rent free headspace.

Hi there, I just wanted to comment because I had similar experience as you did on a different forum too. In my case I don't think the other mummy's knew what high-conflict means, I was told me and my SO were pathetic and childish for having no and low contact and that we need to be more understanding of BM's mummy needs etc etc etc *roll eyes* lol I'm feeling more at ease at this forum though, people actually understand and it's so helpful