Firstly to your first post, although it is no longer a problem, I would be pissed too at him making plans without consulting me and I would just do what I wanted to do with my kid.

Second one, I have a BS14 and an SS11. SS11 doesn't come anymore because he is a spoiled brat and can't get his way at my house, so he proclaims he hates me and is left to make his own decisions. But my BS14 has always treated my husband with respect and has done since day one, his son treated me like crap from day 1 and was never disciplined! My DH just yesterday whinged and complained about BS14 not doing what he was told the first time and has been going off alot since SS11 stopped coming. Well I lost it at DH and told him that he has been treating BS14 differently since his son stoppped coming and if he continues to act this way then he loses the power to discipline my son and that is that!!

Put your daughter in daycare that way you can have peace of mind. Better still she is 6, she can tell you if she is ok with staying with Dh or if she would rather got to daycare, her answer should solve your problem.

I was also a kid with a new step dad when I was young and my mum never stuck up for me and it hurts so much when you as a child, know you are in the right and they are being to harsh and there is no one to stand up for you. I am probably a little over sensitive with my BS14 and pay loads of attention to how my son is treated, but that is because I couldn't stand for him to feel like I did with my SF.

Hope something I said helps you in your situation, I feel I am where you are often.

Catch xx
*Mean People Suck*

If your gut is telling you something, all that I can say is listen! You and your little girl deserve to be safe both emotionally and physically. I hope that things work out for you, whether you stay or go. You will be okay.

It shouldn't be so difficult but because we put up with allt he crap and keep on trucking right through everyone takes us for granted.

My advice is 'do less'! Your DH clearly is unhappy and is taking it out on you guys. He has issues he needs to resolve with his own family before he tries to take it out on you and yours.

It IS unfair and you have to look after No. 1 - take it from one who is trying to learn just that!!!

You know you're right, so I don't need to respond to the Cedar Point thing.

More importantly, what is he so angry about?! I'm curious, because there's got to be something there, other than typical 6yo behavior, that's setting him off. He uses her as a target because she's an easy target, not because she's the real source of his anger. Probably the same if he gets angry with you, too. I'd find out what the true source of his anger is and see if anything can be done about that. (Along with putting her in daycare, of course!)

We went through a rough period when our son was 7-8. DH was way too hard on him, then would accuse me of being too soft. He found out through counseling that his anger was misplaced... he was angry about having been alienated from his kids, he felt guilty about doing anything good for our kids that he couldn't do for his other kids and when it got to be too much, it exploded. Our son was usually the target, because he was an easy target.

We have worked through the worst part of this and are still continuing to deal with this and other things, but a huge part of the resolution was for my husband to own up to what he was really feeling, who he was really angry at, what he was really angry about, etc. Once he did that, he saw for himself that he could be an absolute monster, and then he just broke down because he didn't want our son or daughter to hate him because he hated himself for what happened between him and his other kids. (Not his fault, but he blames himself, anyway.) All of the relationships in our home have improved drastically since he came to this realization, but it was like pulling teeth getting him there. Like with a substance abuser, they have to be willing to admit they have a problem or are at least contributing to the problem in a big way.

I haven't been to Cedar Point since I was a little girl. I remember we went there and to Storybook Forest the same weekend and it was so great! I was probably five or six. Looooong time ago! I wish we had a Storybook Forest near here. My 4yo daughter would love it.

~ Anne ~

We are the masters of our own fate; the architects of our own destiny.

you should listen to your daughter and your gut. You can never be too careful nowadays and I can say that because of all of the crazy things that go on in the world. I have a four year old daughter that is not my husbands and there was a point in time that he was mean to her and I picked up on it and I just had to let him know point blank. Because children can't defend themselves they depend on us to do that and as a mother especially mothers of girls we have to look for signs because children don't tell you that someone is mean to them when they aren't so keep your eyes and ears open and talk to your daughter. I think you are making the right decision to put your daughter into daycare it's for the best. I think you should also consider what's going on in your relationship because do you really want to be with someone that is mean to your child? I know that I wouldn't so think about that and think about your child and what is best for the both of you. And, I'm open to a response to what I had to say so please feel free to respond.