I haven't been to the site in awhile, but knowing there are so many in my shoes helps me get thru the days. Thank you all for reminding me I am not alone in my misery. Our marriage has reached a new low and I could use a little advice from my fellow steps. I got married about a year ago to a man with a teenage son. Why did I marry him after 5 years of dealing with biomom horrors, step crap and most of all an over-indulgent typical Disney dad? Well, obviously because I was an idiot, so lets let that go for now and move on to my latest saga. I assumed (never assume) that when I became his wife, he would spend holidays with me, whether with his parents or mine, or at home if work schedules didn't cooporate. I haven't spent the holidays with my parents for years, because of the stupid way biomom splits the holidays (she has always dictated the schedule). I always stayed in my little crap town with my boyfriend/husband because I thought my place was with him for the most important days of the year. It never crossed my mind to travel without him for any holiday. Wellllll, this year, our first Thanksgiving together, he announced with no discussion first, that we (and his son of course) are going to visit his family in another state (a long flight for us). Fine with me (even though maybe I wanted to see my parents instead), until I asked my boss who said absolutely not. Bummer, we will have to stay home this year right? No, my NEW husband says that he is taking his son to see his parents for Thanksgiving whether I go or not. I told him a husband and wife should spend the major holidays together, especially Thanksgiving (a family holiday that I treasure). After knowing how I felt about it, he went right ahead and bought airline tickets for himself and his son for over a week of time away over Thanksgiving week. He then casually announces this, pretending like he didn't hear a word I said (we fought for hours about it). I am beside myself. I am already thinking what it will feel like alone in my apartment with no family of my own anywhere near (we are stuck where we live to be near the ex...for the kid's sake) while he frolicks on the beach for a week with his family. Who does this to their wife? Did he invite his parents to come to see us instead? NO. Did he tell his family that another holiday would work better this year because his wife wasn't free? NO. Did he trade years with the ex so we could take the kid to see his grandparent next year instead? NO. He didn't even try, and now he is trying to me feel like an idiot for suggesting that a husband and wife should decide together what happens for the holidays and THEN tell the kids, not visa versa. To me, trying to convince him that a husband and wife should spend the holdidays together is like trying to convince someone that the sky is blue. It just is. He cannot be that dense. I realize that he simply doesn't see me as an important factor in his life, just someone who can tag alone with the life he made with his kid. I think this is the last straw in a very big jar of straws. What do you think? What would you do?