SD11 keeps sneaking food
We feed SD11 well. We eat healthy, and of course eat some junk food too but not much. She is not allowed in the pantry or fridge without asking, but if she's truly hungry of course she can ask and have a snack.
She is hoarding and binge eating so much food that it is wrecking my grocery budget. We have a very strict grocery budget and she is eating so much that it's destroying my ability to stay on budget.
In her room, I found in her dresser that she had eaten THREE ENTIRE BOXES of fruit snacks in the course of 2 days (30 total packs!). I also found an empty chip bag, an empty ice cream carton (she hate half the damn carton), you name it.
I can't get her to stop. What do I do? DH is fed up too but she's wrecking our grocery budget and she shouldn't be binge eating like this.
She's not eating because
She's not eating because she's hungry, it's compulsive eating. It taste good, she likes it, it's readily sitting right there tempting her.
Put the junk in the pantry/closet and lock it. She can't access the junk without asking the adult to get her the food. Keep healthy snacks available in the fridge (fresh fruit, cut-up veggie sticks) and perhaps leave a small zip-lock baggie of a serving of crackers, pretzels, small size butter free microwave popcorn (just suggestions) on the counter (just one a day).
These are the 'snacks' she can have or she can do without. Treats such as the ice cream let her know are family treats and only dished out when the family is having some. If she sneaks it she won't get anymore the next time you purchase it.
Sure, you don't have to do the lock thing, but it's a way to end the sneaking. You can either keep fighting over sneaking and losing grocery budget control or you can end it. This is an 11yr pre-teen, if she can't control herself, IMO it's the adult who must take the extra steps to control it. Life's happier that way then never-ending fighting with a compulsive kid who doesn't particularly care if she's been told 'no'. Take control.
I think you need to recognize
I think you need to recognize this is an emotional issue, and not a food or hunger issue. I'm a compulsive eater at times, her anxiety will skyrocket if you just slam on the brakes, so maybe find some middle ground? Help her learn other ways to self comfort?
a girl of that age needs to
a girl of that age needs to have her junk food intake halted. she has an eating disorder and needs help. it sounds like she is hooked on sugar.
Don't have any ice cream in
Don't have any ice cream in the house - store it next door if you happen to have some. Unbuttered unsalted popcorn is healthy and takes a long time to eat. Reread this:
Put the junk in the pantry/closet and lock it (simple padlock and hasp). She can't access the junk without asking the adult to get her the food. Keep healthy snacks available in the fridge (fresh fruit, cut-up veggie sticks) and perhaps leave a small zip-lock baggie of a serving of crackers, pretzels, small size butter free microwave popcorn (just suggestions) on the counter (just one a day).
These are the 'snacks' she can have or she can do without.
I guess I made an assumption
I guess I made an assumption that this child was already receiving counseling to deal with her loss of her mother (recent death) abandonment issues, over cuddling father which see barely sees,, dislike for her SM, severe hygiene immaturity blah blah blah.
Counseling or not, in the meantime (no counseling works quickly, especially with many issues affecting the child and home as a whole)this access to non-stop food needs to stop. Next up will be dental bills for rotten teeth the home can not afford, a lifelong of set unhealthy eating choices, and for the next at least 7yrs a SD who will have no guidelines/boundaries when it comes to respect and behavior towards the adult female of the home. This is a troubled little girl rapidly approaching teen years, as Sm is her main caretaker and counseling is not instant , Sm is going to end up with so much built up resentment bordering on hatred toward this kid IMO Sm needs to take control of what SM can...even if it means locking food up and making the only choices healthy appropriate serving selections available.