Sorry, one last Q about this damn Breakup
I know this forum isn't intended for break-up woes, but it helps me get it off my chest. So here it goes...
When he and I first began dating, I felt like his counselor because of how much he vented to me about his exW and her cheating. They were on acceptable speaking terms when he and I met with definite boundaries. But I listened and gave advice and helped him through his trust issues.
Now that we are broken up and it's uncertain whether they are truly back together - he denies being with her romantically, but I dunno. My friends are telling me that I should't have thoughts of him being all happy and living life to the fullest while I lay here and cry. They say I shouldn't have those thoughts because his emotional state when he came into my life is the same emotional state he is in now. Well, that SHOULD make me feel better. But the biggest hardship for him when he came into my life was his exW. But now they are best friends. So isn't it safe to assume he is happier since his situation has reversed to his favor???
Yea, but now he has her.
Yea, but now he has her.
They talk about EVERYTHING. And now they do things together with their son. My ex also used to hate when his visitations were over. He missed his boy so much. But now I"m sure he's happy because...he gets him all the time and he has her back, at least as a friend if not more.
??? where is the blog????
??? where is the blog????
Thank u!!!
Don't beat yourself up about
Don't beat yourself up about it.
I did the right thing. I am a good person. I helped someone in their time of need and gave all I needed to give. Asking any more of me is selfish and greedy. I will get through this and be stronger.
That should be your mantra for as long as it takes.
Kindly saying two things
Kindly saying two things here:
1. You will make yourself into a batshit crazy ex if you lay around and think about it. Get up, get moving, get out, do something, every night sob to a different friend/family member.
You are your own responsibility - take care of yourself and start the moving on process.
2. Lesson learned - don't be a sounding board for a man's breakup woes unless you really are just friends and it will only ever be that way, like only for your gay friends. You will remember all the shit he said about her while he will forget it about and like this guy, in the rosy glow of not actually being rejected after all, he will forget 95% of all that he sobbed while you will think on it and think on it.
You are definitely right. I'm
You are definitely right. I'm meeting up with a friend for a evening jog around the lake in a couple hours. I'm sure it will help.
That is AWESOME, definitely a
That is AWESOME, definitely a step in the right direction! Now think about running a 5k or the Boston Marathon.
^^^^^^ this ^^^^^^ And you go
^^^^^^ this ^^^^^^
And you go girl! The running is a great idea, take care of yourself, and know that you are strong, and physically,mentally and emotionally strong.
Well the jog is a great idea,
Well the jog is a great idea, and you need to keep that up. Sure you will have to cry some of it out, but as for worrying abou whether he is happy or not, who cares. Let him have his happiness with the ex if that is what he wants, or thinks he wants or whatever, if he is doing this to you, sooner or later he will probably do it to her. Wouldn't be the first guy to go back to the ex only to pay her back for what she did to him. But whether they break up or live happily ever after you have no control over. You really do not want a guy who could do this to you, and who openly put his child before you. There was another post on here, engaged couple, both agreed to "put the kids first" there were kids on both sides. So, she moves in, and low and behold, a week later his 9 year old is sleeping in the bed with them, when she (the fiance) had specifically said she didn't want the child in the bed. Now she is on here quite upset about it. This is what happens whenever you put the kids first and not the relationship. She agreed to kids first rule, then gets upset when he puts the kid first. It doesn't work for anyone. This man would have broken your heart one way or the other. Go get someone with no kids and have a happy wonderful life. The steparent thing is ever so hard, I think you are young enough to find someone to love, and who loves you ABOVE all others. Go jog girl, jog that heartache right of your system. Before too long you will realise you dodged a great big bullet here.
For the future, red flag #1:
For the future, red flag #1: He talks about his exW incessantly. You sound like a nice person. You deserve someone who is into YOU.
Good luck!
They are in their honeymoon
They are in their honeymoon period. They both want 'someone' and as they share a son they are together... for now. Eventually the cracks will show all over again. It did once before it will happen agasin. The only time people get back together for good is when they have both grown up and learnt from their mistakes and vow never to do those things that destroyed their relationship in the first place.
sorry to hear you pain!!It
sorry to hear you pain!!It seems not fair that after all you gave him he went back to her.This can be a valuable lesson though, since indeed if there is too much talk about the ex, it is not a good sign that the partner is really over her /him.It is a very hard situation for you.
When something similar happened to me I started visiting a fabulous website- google breakup survivor .There is a forum with great people and you can post and post and post and you get the ongoing support with people in similar situations.I mean , post as much here, too, of course, hun, what I mean is, that you meet a lot of people going through the same stages of a painful break up, that may help a bit more than only coming here.
Try it out and look after yourself as good as you can!!xxx
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