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SS15 Exposed himself to my DD11

Craving Normality's picture

I have not let him stay at our house since, but think he might be trying to come over for Christmas lunch.

He is ADD ODD and all sorts of other stuff. He has just been expelled from his high school for drug related causes.

I have banished him from our lives. Would anyone else let him back?

9 months have passed and I expect people would think I may have forgiven and forgotten - I have not!

Would you?

WalkOnBy's picture

Were the police called when the incident originally took place?? If not, why not?

There is no way in hell I would let a kid who exposed himself be anywhere near the victim. Uh uh. NO WAY!!!

Your husband is free to see his son, just not in your house when your daughter is there. If dad needs to see kid in the house, then you and your daughter go for a spa day.

Stepped in what momma's picture

My question is if she is to start laughing at him and saying he has a small penis seems it could piss him off. If he has already done what he did that might not a good idea.

Craving Normality's picture

We had him the last time he got suspended from school, he stayed here and worked with his father. That is when he exposed himself to my child in her room. Now he is expelled from school, he is working with his father until the school term is filled. I can just see them warming up to a visit at my house, which I never, ever, want to suggest to my daughter is ok.
I did threaten to put him on the sex offenders register, but did not followthrough because he has so far stayed away and not been a presence in my daughters life..
I never try to stop his own father ffrom being with him.

Monchichi's picture

Then there is no need for him to come to anything at your house. They have regular contact. Topic is closed, protect your child first and foremost.

Craving Normality's picture

My spouse was supportive, never doubtedfr a minute. I just know, it is his child, and he has been dropping a few hints about him wanting to see the rest of the fam and so on.
And he also mentioned that SS's fam don't have xmas lunch,they have it on boxing day, just a few subttle hints.

notasm3's picture

I would have called the cops. Period. Sexual harassment of an 11year old child is a a BIG Fing deal. Nothing to be trivialized.

Craving Normality's picture

That is something I wishI had done. But I did not at the time. My daughter took one month to tell me, so it was very difficult. I have said to her, in future,if anything bad happens, please please tell me right then.

Craving Normality's picture

Suspended for groping a girl, then suspended for being stoned, then expelled for having dope at school.

hereiam's picture

Yeah, this is a problem. This kid would never be in my home again and never be around my kid. The first time he touched my daughter, I'd be in prison for murder.

Is your husband doing anything to get his son some help? Like counseling or something?

Craving Normality's picture

I know, I have read heaps, His own little sister is the same age as my dd and he beats her up. I read about sex crimes and told the parents. He will escalate from here,, I don't think they believe me.

Craving Normality's picture

Sally, I appreciate your input completly, however, I don't need to walk out. This is my home. I just need the boundaries. I am so pleased I got some back up on here. I was wondering if I shoudl be more forgiving than I can be, but thank goodness no one suggests as I should be.

I think that is why I am here. I was totally unforgiving and not willing to forget, and just looking for second opinions which I now have and feel more confident in my resolves.

Craving Normality's picture

yes, fruitsalad, he has on so many occassions I could not count them, attacjked his own sister. We do not live with them so it is very hard to control. The dad is aware, but not as "aware" as I am. He has been attacking her since she was 4 and he was 8. Sad but true. I have tried, but they are not my children, they do not live in my home, and I can only police what goes on here. I do not believe it has been anything other than violence at this point. She is a great child. I just keep reinforcing to her that it is not normal to have a big brother hurt his little sister so frequently, I know. Very weak from me, but I have tried

Craving Normality's picture

I did not contact the police even though every ouce of my being suggested I should. I really wish I had.

Craving Normality's picture

I know you are right. I have no excuses. Watching his parents explain this away and justify revolting behaviour has desensitised me from the revolting. I am back on board though, after this post.

Salems Lot's picture

Based on what you have stated here, this young man IS a sexual predator and should not be allowed in your home and he should never be allowed near your daughter. It doesn't matter if it's Christmas, his Birthday or even someones funeral!

Craving Normality's picture

HRNYC as much as I know my daughter would hate to push this further I am going to insist. It's been less than a year,

Craving Normality's picture

That was exactly how she was, "don't tell him I told you" he is the older step brother who is meant to be the protector.
She worries about the repercussions.