think my bf is in jail... can't take this anymore!

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hey everyone,

i posted a couple weeks ago about how my boyfriend is living with his ex wife at the moment for god knows what reason. at first i believed him now i'm just like forget all of this. he told me not to call him, that he'll call me because he doesn't want her to get a hold of his phone (put a lock on it, duh.) anyway, the other night i got a call from him. i said hello, and his phone disconnected. he called back like 10 minutes later and he was like i told you not to call here and i said ummm i didn't, i know better than that. then i heard his ex wife yelling in the background and he was telling her to calm down and then he hung up. it's been a few days and haven't heard anything. she's mentally unstable and he could do some damage to someone if he wanted to. his voice was shaky and i'm scared that he's not ok. just wanted to post on here because people were very supportive on my last post. what would you do? please let me know

Move on...He is still married

Move on...He is still married to her...

My now dh was living with his

My now dh was living with his ex wife of 10 years when we met. They were living separately in another state..decided to move back here, to his home state..so for the sake of ease and transition..they thought it would be ok to live together for a while with their son. I can say with 100% certainty that I do not believe there was any desire to be together...I was threatened at all.

However, I could call him whenever i wanted...and I stayed the night there(she was told to stay at her bf's so it wasn't so weird to all be under one roof). She came by a few times to get things she forgot...no secrets, transparency.

I'm with the others...he's still in a relationship with her...run.

its hard because she's a

its hard because she's a psycho...... i wish i could go to her and talk to her as a civil human being but i can't. thanks for your advice, i appreciate it

My dh's ex is pretty nuts

My dh's ex is pretty nuts herself...borderline personality, pill popper..total nutjob. That's why we have my ss full time. It's really not your place to talk to her....he picked her, not you. What you need is for him to put boundaries on their relationship...but, they are still IN a relationship if he is telling you not to contact to not upset her...she is his priority...you are a side dish.

Early on...because dh was living with the ex, they had blurred boundaries. WE are still working on it a bit...but it gets a thousand times better all the time. Sometimes he just needs a heads up when they are not acting like "normal" exs. Good luck!

He's not your BF. BFs don't

He's not your BF.

BFs don't live with other women.

He's making you his go to chick. When he screws up at home,he can run to you until BM calms down.

It will continue until you say enough. Then he'll find a new go to chick.

Get away from him.

It is fishy that he wont let

It is fishy that he wont let you call. Have you actually seen the divorce paper work? Why cant he live with you if he is divorced?

If you haven't seen the paper work I and leaning with the others he might still be married. Find out, demand to see the paper work for yourself. If he doesn't agree I think you need to consider leaving him, there are a lot of "single" guys out there, I know it is tough but you have to do what is best for you. Or go straight to the "ex" wife and ask her flat out are they married or not. FB is also a great tool, ask one of her friends on facebook. There are ways to get the information you need.

i've seen the paperwork. it's

i've seen the paperwork. it's just little weird things that makes me think that there's something going on, like he takes her to the store and the fact that his business is still her business even though they're divorced. i'm still a 22 year old student and he's 8 years older than me. i wonder if i even want to deal with his ex wife and two kids in the first place. thanks for your response

No, you don't. Drop him like

No, you don't. Drop him like a rock. You're too young to have to deal with this shit.

perhaps you're right.. thanks

perhaps you're right.. thanks for your input

I would leave and change my

I would leave and change my telephone number!! I'm with the others, he is just using you. RUN!!

Buh Bye!!

YOU ARE WAY TOO YOUNG TO PUT

YOU ARE WAY TOO YOUNG TO PUT UP WITH THIS DRAMA.

There are PLENTY of guys out there who would LOVE to have you call them. Believe me, honey, you are better off without THIS loser.

thank you i appreciate it

thank you for the reality

thank you for the reality check...... i just need to open my eyes :/
thanks for your reply, i appreciate it
i should've listened to my mom from the beginning

Echo, thank you so much for

Echo,

thank you so much for your great advice. this has definitely been the toughest situation i've been in relationship wise. your kind words are really helping me and i've taken them to heart. i'm slowly realizing that i don't deserve to live like this. thank you from the bottom of my heart once again. God bless and i hope everything works out for you too. <3

OMG what a line he has fed

OMG what a line he has fed you!!! :jawdrop: I am sorry that you have found yourself in this situation, but please think what this is doing to your self respect and confidence.

This situation is just plain weird. I am with the other posters, its HIGHLY unlikely this man is not boning his ex and playing happy families with his children and BM while stringing you along. ALL the signs are there. If this man was THAT desperate to get away from the ex he wouldnt be living with her, he wouldnt be *sharing* a business, thats just plain fucked up. AND on top of that (as if that isnt enough in itself), he bans you from ringing and is so paranoid he has to pretend that YOU have rung him when his wife catches him ringing and speaking to you - THAT is why he accused you of ringing him, so he could wriggle out of ownership of what he is up to - god knows what he has told BM about you, that you are some stalking lovestruck friend/ex. Come on!

Even if by some miracle this man is possibly telling you some truth in his "story" - why hasnt he separated his life? Why is he lying about who you are and hiding you like some sorid secret? WHY hasnt he rung you in days?!!!! I doubt that BM has him chained in her basement and is with him while taking a dump, so he COULD find a moment to ring/text/fb/email you, but he hasnt. He's using you and badly at that.

This man isnt exactly treating you like a princess and making your dreams come true, so stop wasting your precious time on this earth with a lying scumbag and leave him to those who deserve him - BM.

things are complicated, more

things are complicated, more complicated than i think i'll ever know. its like digging an endless hole. i should go find a good guy huh?

Let it go..everyone is right,

Let it go..everyone is right, I know it prolly hurts you but something are best left alone.
If he trys to contact you in the near future tell him to kick rocks!

I think the women on here are pretty well seasoned and wouldn't tell you anything that isn't obvious !

^^^All of the

^^^All of the above^^^
They're right, delete his number, block it, get all dolled up, and hit the town!
Find a man that is gonna treat you the way you deserve to be treated! Cause what this jackass is doing....ain't it honey! No One deserves to be treated like that! Good Luck!!!

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think my bf is in jail... can't take this anymore!