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Will the Human Leech (BM) change now????

hangingin's picture

The BM in my life has just recently had a Massive Heart Attack...
All four Arteries have to be repaired, they have to go back in due to almost losing her on the table,so for now waiting to get stronger for second surgery.The cause is probably due to a dozen related reasons, she smokes like a chimney, she drinks like a fish, she is hugely over-weight AND don't EVER trust her near your medicine cabinets!!! She has, and does, take any drug that she finds, just like it is candy.(she took some of my BIL'S meds, not even looking at what they were, (bowel movement meds)can you guess what happened....)AND that is only the medical issues, she is a manipulative, shreaking harpi shrew, who will throw tantrums just like a 2 year old if she dosen't get her way!USUALLY OVER MONEY, BECAUSE SHE REFUSES TO WORK AND THINKS THE WORLD OWES HER!!(I kid you not,I HAVE ACTUALLY SEEN ONE OF THEM)AND she has molded my SD into her image,though SD does not throw tantrums, she has a little polish to her,but her manipulating is shades of Big Mamoooo!! My question is this, As any normally sane person would stop and take in the fact that this a sign to at least change your health habits,do has anyone out there experienced something like this and the person came away from the experience a completely changed person??? Like for her she would be a deeply caring human being who puts others before herself ect.....and if she dosen't change, the first time she throws the FAMOUS DRAMA MAMA act, will she blow a gasget??(excuse the pun)
Just a thought... really am hoping too, because I will then have to put up with mini Mamoooo!!
hangingin

Chocoholic's picture

I personally don't believe that our BM will ever change.... I also don't think my son's SM will ever change....

People have to WANT to change, and 9 out of 10 times they simply never take the time to self refelect... they don't see a problem with their behavior, and so they have no desire to change a thing...

To them, everything they do and the way they act has some underlying justifiable reason....

However, it really doesn't matter what I think because their paths are in God's hands.... I do hope that people like these women find happiness and change for the better.... but I'm not holding my breath either.

"Don't be distracted by criticism. Remember, the only taste of success some people ever have is when they take a bite out of you."

kathleen's picture

I think you are absolutely right. The thing is it doesn't matter if they EVER change. What matter's is how we change. All we can do is adapt to our circumstance to survive. It's just like in nature. Those that can't adapt disapear. We make our own choices in life, in every possible. way.

kathleen's picture

Did you change your user name? I hear you loud and clear.

hangingin's picture

but I did borrow her "Harpi" name,it just sort of fits with our EX,along with the "HUMAN LEECH, Big Mamooo and a few others! If you ever hear her, you will know what I mean! Actually,Jenniferlynn and I have compared our 2 EX's and they are soooo close it is scarrrry!!! Ask her!!!
Thank you for your advice! We are the ones who ultimitely make our own choices!

hangingin

chellebelle143's picture

You guys might want to reconsider using the term Harpy. In early Greek literature, including the writings of Homer and Hesiod, they were wind spirits and were not represented as being ugly. I also read that in earlier Greek Mythology they were represented as being beautiful fair haired maidens. Just a thought, but doesn't seem as if the bbs you have described are beautiful or FAIR!!LOL Wink

**How seldom we weigh our neighbors in the same balance as ourselves. ~Thomas à Kempis**

hangingin's picture

When she was in her late teens, she was quite beautiful,but the lifestyle that she has chosen really did a number on her!Oh,and ever so charming!!!(really, no joke) you know, one of those charismatic type people??? Before I really ever met her, I would see her around and think she really is a funny happy go-lucky woman!! until you get to know the real person up close and personal, EEKK,YUK! If you scratch her, she would ooze out all the bile that she has inside, plus the misery that has built up that is her life!!

hangingin

Candice's picture

problems are going to change, even for a heart attack. They, like everyone else, must want the change.

I had a MIL who was a nurse, but did everything to ruin her health.
She smoked, was overweight with high blood pressure, refused to exercise, or even get out of bed most of the days, only would drink diet pepsi for fluids, and was a pill popper. She suffered from many physical issues as a result of her lifestyle choice, which included, triple heart bypass surgery, hip replacement, diabetes, and she lost her legs from poor circulation.

None of those disfugrements were even a remote cause to her to give up pop or the cigarettes, for a more healthy choice of living. Nor were her grandchildren. I know she was despressed, but she made choices, and I can't help but feel that she committed suicide b/c she refused to change her eating habits. We all only have one body and one life, and we owe it to ourselves to take every step to ensure we take care of our bodies, and we owe it to our spouses and children to be the healthiest wives and mothers possible. They need and depend on us.

Susbstance abuse is very scary, and until she has a sobering moment and decides to want to live healthy, she will more than likely return to a life of substance abuse until it takes her life.