So since FDH can't think to do a few things that I ask that has to do with his kids, I have stepped back on helping take care of them. I am not completely disengaging because I dont think its necessary or will be good for me but I told him things will change. So he gets off work and a friend calls and offers him money to go do a tow for her. He mentions it, and I just casually continue cleaning in the kitchen and just nodded my head to acknowledge that he was talking to me. He knew what that reply meant. 20 minutes later she call back and offers him $125 (it was $75 to start with). He tells me and I go "thats nice, tell her she can give you the $125 and she can watch your kids for you while you do it". He did a fake laugh and I heard nothing more about it. I told him the only time I am watching them was when he worked at his main job. Any other time, they are HIS responsibility until he shows me more respect with things that has to do with them.

He is bummed out now but I feel pretty damn good that I can get my cleaning done without them following me everywhere needing my constant attention. At 9 and 6 these kids should be able to go play with toys. FDH needs a serious eye opener to how much I do for him and his kids. I do it because I want to so no I do not want to disengage, I enjoy being a part of their lives. But I will get respect for it or his life will not continue to be easy peasy.