Judge talking to children...
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Guess the reason the trial is being delayed is the judge needs to talk to the kids. My poor kids have been through so much I hate to think they are going to be drilled as what goes on in each parents household. Has anyone had any experience with this? What kind of questions will the judge ask the kids? Guess he does it in his chambers and only him and the kids are allowed in.
Should go well, our
Should go well, our experience was judge listened to SS and DH got custody. We just coached SS to be truthful.
You don't need to worry about
You don't need to worry about this. The judge isn't going to "integrate" them and you don't need to know what kind of questions he will ask because you should not prepare them for this.
What you need to explain is the judge wants to talk to them so that he can hear their concerns from them. That sometimes other people don't really understand what we think and THEY should be allowed to speak for themselves. Tell the kids to be honest with him. There is a good chance he will speak to them alone so that he doesn't have to worry about them being pressured by anyone.
I know you wouldn't intentionally but kids will flavor things to please an adult. With you there they may exaggerate something or even not tell the full truth because they are afraid of how you will respond. The judge wants them to be able to freely talk without worrying about what they say.
Thank you for responding.
Thank you for responding. Unfortunately the judge refuses to talk to the kids separate, I asked, and will talk to them together. The problem is my youngest told me his dad (my ex) is telling the kids what to say. I don't thing he will get to far with him BUT My oldest is always looking for ways to please my ex and I can see him being talked into something which intern my youngest will just go along. Don't know maybe im overreacting but no matter how wrong my ex is he always seems to get the upper hand.
So WHO requested this
So WHO requested this in-camera interview, YOU or your ex?
I guess my ex could have but
I guess my ex could have but it was my understanding its just "standard protocol" for the judge to talk to the kids alone. I could be wrong but I know I did not request it.
Jeopardy background music
Jeopardy background music continues to play.
It's not only the judge and
It's not only the judge and the kids, not on Mars any way.....
With us this happens when the divorce is not really friendly or if a judge feels that one parent is trying to nail the other parent.
In Chambers there will be a social worker or therapist, but neither parent is allowed to know who this person is and this person may never contact the parents. This person is only there to observe and will make recommendations to the judge.
Judge ask simple questions, how do you like your room, what was the last naughty thing you did, how did mummy react, how did daddy react,
who's your best friend in school, do you like your teacher, do you have a dog, is it difficult living with mummy/daddy/going back and forth between houses. Who do you like best, SM/SF.... what work does Daddy/mummy do....
simply things and with us, yes it's all recorded and no parents will never see that recording because the judge does not want one parent to feel attacked. It's very confidential and the recommendations then will determine if another therapist sees the recordings or not. The judge will look at the recording with a therapies after the kids and then decisions are made... My brother waited 2 months before he got the judgement, he got all 3 kids in the divorce and Mum only got supervised visitation. 2 of those 3 kids are my brothers, and the youngest one is not his, she jumped the fence on that one but the judge felt that the little one is better off with my brother, he raised her for 1 year by then......this little girl is turning 8 now....
I've been down this road
I've been down this road before. In our case the kids went in with their law guardian without the parents In the judges chambers not the court room. Very low key. The judge will not drill the kids BUT if your BM is anything like ours SHE will. We found out our BM was instructing the kids what to tell the judge including all out lies about myself and BD. 11 year old boys don't keep secrets very well. Anyways we told our attorney this but nothing ever came of it. I found the courts unfortunately don't really care about this he said she said stuff as they have bigger issues to deal with.