Not liking the wording in her modification
Forums:
As some of you know, my BM is signing over custody to my DH so she can move away and start a new life with her boyfriend. Our lawyer just sent me the modification draft her lawyer drew up. It looks OK but one thing that is kind of bothering me is that it keeps referring to BM as "the wife" and DH as "the husband". I have been married to my DH for over 10 years now. As far as I know, I'm the only wife he has. I know I'm being petty but couldn't they use the words "plantiff" and "defendent"? Or, even the suffix "ex-" in there?
It just bugs me.
Yea, that is weird....
I would see if you could have it changed. It is not even current or accurate. If your DH has no problem with it, well, maybe nothing will be done about it, but even on my divorce decree, the very first one, it says plaintiff and defendent. I mean the whole point is that we aren't married anymore, right?
My court order for my children..
(along with my husband's) say "MOTHER" and "FATHER". Or how about Petioner and Respondent?
Their relationship is no longer husband and wife it is now reduced to mother and father of the children they share. That's it. I would definitely change it....and for what it's worth, it would bother me too.
"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass...It's about learning to dance in the rain."
It's a carryover...
...from the divorce. When we went back to court with my skids' BM, they had been divorced for two years and we'd been married for one, but the old papers referred to them as "husband" and "wife" and so did the new ones. When my husband adopted my son, we had to get permission from my son's biological father. Those papers referred to my ex as "husband" and me as "wife," too. My feeling on it? You know who you are. And you know who she is. So does your DH. You can ask your lawyer to change it to something more palatable to you, but I don't think I would want to risk rocking the boat. It might be a tad petty, but what if she decides to be petty back and not sign the papers? Nah, I'd let it go. It's not worth it. Like I said, you know who you are.
~ Anne ~
"Adjust on the fly, or you're going to cry."
Steve Doocy, The Mr. and Mrs. Happy Handbook
Ours is the same way!
and I HATE it too!
I especially hate when BB refers to my DH as her "husband". Its like are you kidding me?
I think its just a legal thing, like Anne said, a carryover.
However I completely feel you on this one and agree that they should change it!
me too
i especially hates when he refers to the past and says "we" (when we bought our first house, etc). I always remind him that "WE" didn't because he didn't know me then.
Yep, I know the whole "WE" sayings...
My husband, bless his soul, used to say the same phrases---"when WE lived in that house" "when WE had the van" "WE, WE, WE, WE!" Finally one day I said "Enough with the cotton picking 'WE's---Cause WE, my dear, were not apart of it!" It took him a little while to stop saying those things. It was funny b/c I could see his little face wriggled up when he was trying to stop himself from saying it.
Now all the "WE"s heard in this family include him, me, my son and SD. 